The Ripples You Create

Imagine every one of us has a circular dam with concrete walls that represents our lives and the vibrations we send out into the Universe. The dam is in another realm. We don’t know how big our own respective dams are. Now imagine everything you do on a daily basis, causes a pebble or rock being dropped near the centre of the dam. Also imagine that a version of yourself is standing in the centre of the dam. The water comes up to your neck. You are fine … it is comfortable and you can breathe, no problem.

Then life happens.

As life happens, every thing you do … everything you think … everything you say … every person you associate with … causes a pebble, rock or boulder to be dropped into your dam. What happens when a pebble or rock drops into a dam filled with water? Two things.

1) It causes a ripple. The size of which is dependent on the size of the pebble, rock or boulder that was dropped into your dam.

2) The level of the water must inevitably rise with each solid object that gets dropped into your dam.

Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com

See where I am going with this?

Now figure this:

Every person will cause ripples on a daily basis. That’s just life. Thus every person will have at least a few pebbles dropping into their dam every day … and so (eventually) each one of us will die when the level of the water of our dam rises up above our noses and we cannot breathe anymore. That’s the harsh reality of our mortality. We will die. It is a given. This will happen when enough pebbles, rocks or boulders have fallen into out respective dams.

Your dam may be bigger than that of some other people. We don’t get the same size of dam and we cannot see how big our own dam is. For that reason some people may die young because their dam was small and it didn’t require too many pebbles or rocks to cause the water level to rise above their noses. For whatever reason, that’s another harsh reality we have to deal with. We will die, but we don’t know when. Some will die young and others will live longer. We cannot control some things in life. We can, however, give ourselves the best chance to live as long as possible. How? By making sure only pebbles get dropped into our dam. Logic tells you that ten pebbles a day will cause your dam level to rise less than ten rocks … or one boulder.

Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com

Let me get to the point here:

Every day your actions, thoughts and words (and even the people you associate with) cause pebbles, rocks or boulders to be dropped into your dam. The size of the object being dropped into your dam is dependent on how positive or negative your actions, thoughts or words are. Our mortality ensures that at least pebbles will be dropped into your dam every day. So, your level of water will rise every day … closer to the point where it goes over your nose and you die. That simply means your life will run out someday. As I said before, we cannot control that we will die. It will happen. What you can, however, control is to give yourself the best chance to live as long as possible. How do we do that?

Simple.

Do positive things, use positive words and think positive thoughts … and only small pebbles get dropped into your dam. That means small ripples are created and your water level will rise very slowly. Pebbles (positive lifestyle) are small … so they create small ripples and take up very small area at the bottom of your dam … so the level of the water in your dam will take a long time to rise to your nose. Of course rocks and boulders (negative lifestyle) will create much bigger ripples or waves … and they will also see to it that your dam level rises far quicker. Wouldn’t you rather want to fill your dam with pebbles (long and comfortable life), than with rocks or boulders (short, stormy, traumatic and drama filled life)?

Photo by Melike B. on Pexels.com

Be sure to create small ripples every day of your life.

Now let me tell you about the ripples or vibrations you cause every day of your life:

The Universe has a simple law: “What you give, is what you get.” It is very simple.

Say, do and think positive words, deeds and thoughts every day and you will cause only pebbles to be dropped into your dam. This causes small ripples and your water level will also rise very slowly. You will have a comfortable life. Only small ripples will go out and when it reaches your dam wall, it will bounce back and come back to you.

The point is quite simple: what you give out to the Universe, predicts what will come back to you. This is a law of the Universe. You cannot debate the fact. It is what it is. Whatever you give out, will come back to you … be it positive or negative. Better make sure the vibrations you send out are positive then, don’t you think? Yes indeed.

Positive words, deeds and actions will release small pebbles into your dam. This causes small ripples, that will come back to you at some stage. Because they are so small, it won’t bother you, it will soothe you and create beautiful and relaxing ripples in the water. You will feel good and experience good things. After all, you gave out good vibrations, so that’s what will come back to you.

Photo by cottonbro on Pexels.com

Another law of the Universe: Once you do, say or think something, it is done. You cannot undo it. Sorry won’t help. Changing your ways will not help or change the effects of any ripples that were created before you changed your ways. It has already created a vibration or ripple in your dam. Just as sure as I am sitting here, that ripple you created will come back to you. At some stage, that ripple will strike your dam wall and come back to you. You might have a small dam and then the ripple will come back sooner, rather than later … or you might have a big dam and then that ripple will take it’s time to come back to you. But it is a fact that it WILL come back to you.

It

Will

Come

Back

To

You.

You can do nothing about it. Once a vibration or ripple has been created by your actions, words or thoughts it WILL come back to you at some stage in your life.

It might sometimes take long to come back to you … and you might have totally changed your ways by the time it eventually comes back to you. You will be very surprised then. You might have forgotten all about that negative ripple you created a long time ago. It might shock you, because you have been living a good and positive life for a very long time. You may have thought your new positive way of life has eliminated or cancelled that negative ripple. Sorry dude, it doesn’t work like that. Once a ripple has been created, it has been created … and it will go out until it strikes your dam wall. Then it will find it’s way back to you where you are standing in the middle of your dam … and it will hit you from all sides at once. You see, ripples travel out one after the other in the order you created them. New ripples you create will follow the older ones, but can never catch them or cancel them or eliminate them. Each of them goes out wider and wider in the order of occurrence, patiently following each other, until each ripple or vibration strikes your dam wall. Then it stops going out, changes direction and travels back inwards right to where it originally came from … YOU.

Photo by Jeremy Bishop on Pexels.com

I hope you are catching my drift here?

If not, let me explain.

Positive and good deeds, words and thoughts will cause small and positive vibrations or ripples. These will eventually come back to you as good vibrations or ripples. Good things will happen to you, because that’s what you put out in the first place. Your life should also be longer (unless you have a small dam), because the pebbles will cause the level of your water to rise very slowly. You might sometimes do or say something which causes a rock to be dropped into your dam and that bigger ripple will then come back to you and temporarily cause you discomfort or drama. It happens to all of us. Nobody is perfect. The point is, that the negative ripple was maybe a singular occurrence or maybe it only happens a few times in your life. The negative effect it will cause will therefore not last long before the positive ripples you have created will once again bring peace and harmony into your life.

The opposite happens when you are guilty of daily or regular negative deeds, thoughts and words. Negativity will cause rocks or boulders to drop into your dam. Of course rocks and boulders create larger ripples or vibrations. It also causes your water level to rise quicker, because they are bigger than pebbles … thus shortening your life. Now, at some stage those large ripples or vibrations must come back to you. Remember, once it was created it WILL come back to you. It cannot be cancelled or eliminated. So what happens when large ripples strike you one after the other? You will feel as if you are drowning … struggling to keep your nose above the water before the next large ripple strikes you. Your life will be a struggle, filled with turmoil and drama. No use blaming other people then. You created the negative ripples through your own deeds, words and thoughts. You may understand now that sending out a lot of bad vibrations or negative ripples into the Universe is not the best idea. In fact, it is a very stupid idea. It will come back to you, full stop.

Photo by kira schwarz on Pexels.com

Now the good thing about a bad ripple is that it is only a ripple. It will end. So, you will experience pain … sadness … struggle … sickness … misfortune for only a period of time. This is a result of that bad ripple you sent out at some stage. Then suddenly the ripple will be gone. Then you can breathe again. Things will look up then. The bad ripple you had created came back to you and it affected you negatively, because it reflected the vibrations or energy you sent out when you created it. Harmony will, however, be restored if the bad ripple is followed by positive vibrations.

You might understand now that you would want to keep the bad vibrations or negative ripples you create to the bare minimum.

Yes, Einstein … that would be a very good idea.

You want to keep those negative waves to a bare minimum, otherwise your life is just going to be a struggle.

Now, we all do or say bad things or think negative thoughts. Therefore, each of us will have some misfortune or tough times at some stage in life when those negative ripples or vibrations we had created came back to us. We learn from it. Wise people will adapt and embrace only positive deeds, words and thoughts. Wise people will be very conscious about what vibrations they send out or what ripples they create. You can really predict your future quite accurately in this way.

Other people will experience lots of drama, heartache, sickness or loss on a consistent basis … all due to the negative vibrations or ripples they themselves have sent out or created by their own deeds, words or thoughts.

It really is as simple as that.

For example: Murderers or rapists will cause huge boulders to drop into their dams. This causes huge waves that will come back to them and suppress their heads under the water. That’s when they get caught and gets sentenced for their evil deeds. Or they will die early. I have seen this so many times. They simply sign their own death certificates by committing a murder. If they do not die themselves, they doom themselves to a life of hell on earth. They will rot in a prison and their lives can never be joyful and pleasant (even if they are not caught).

Photo by Kammeran Gonzalez-Keola on Pexels.com

The same goes for any negative action, be it stealing, adultery or whatever. By committing a negative act, you have created a negative wave that WILL come back to you as sure as I am writing this. It will come back to you. The same goes for words and thoughts … although deeds are the strongest creator of vibrations or ripples of the three.

You might understand by now that you are dooming yourself to receive some sort of loss, heartache, struggle, bad luck or drama by sending out negative vibrations or energy. It will come back to you … sooner or later. Once it was created, it will come back to you. Nope, you can pray and ask for forgiveness all you want … it will come back to you. That’s how this particular law of the Universe works. It is best to understand the simplicity and harsh reality of the vibrations you create. It is a heartless creation. You simply get back what you created yourself. Stupid people use the word bad luck. You don’t have bad luck … you have self made creations. Your tomorrow is dependent on what you choose to do today.

Now, some people are habitual creators of negative vibrations or ripples. What does that mean? Their lives will be filled with constant drama, struggle, loss, sickness, heartache, etc. It won’t be just a season caused by one negative wave … it will continue for as long as they continue to create negative waves or vibrations.

Catch my drift?

Yes, you should understand by now that positive thoughts, deeds and words are critical every day of your life, no matter what. Why? Every positive ripple or vibration you send out, will come back to you as a positive vibration and it will bring goodness, prosperity, happiness and peace with it.

Photo by Skylar Kang on Pexels.com

I want to go deeper into this. You are probably only thinking about the obvious superficial things when you consider what positive or negative vibrations are. It goes so MUCH deeper than that. Allow me to explain :

Adopting a healthy lifestyle is a very positive action and will bring more positivity back to you in more ways than you can imagine. The mere act of appreciating your body and looking after it, creates beautiful vibrations that will bring so many blessings back to you. Not only will you be healthy and energetic, you will also find that doors will open on so many levels for you if you simply take care of your health every day. In short, you will prosper on all levels just by appreciating and taking care of your life and body.

The same goes for obeying the laws of your country.

Stick to the speed limit.

Don’t litter.

Live in harmony with all life forms.

Don’t make noise.

Don’t cheat on your partner.

Don’t abuse alcohol or drugs.

When the government orders you to stay home during the pandemic, stay home. Don’t think you know better and can bend the rules as it suits you personally.

Simple little things like these will either send out negative vibrations or positive vibrations into the Universe.

Don’t be fooled, they will come back to you in some way.

Photo by Ivan Bertolazzi on Pexels.com

What have we learned?

Yes … be it positive or negative vibrations, they will come back to you.

Once a vibration or ripple has been created it will come back to you at some stage … be it positive or negative. It is a law of the Universe. Even I am still guilty of sending out negative ripples sometimes. The difference between myself and most other people, is that I know when I have done wrong (like toy with someone’s emotions, without the intent to really date her). Yes, I know when I send out negative vibrations … and I know they will come back to me … and when they do, I always point my finger at myself. I admit it was my own doing or choices that created that negative vibration, which inevitably came back to me. You will never find me pointing my finger at anyone else. I always point my finger at myself. I was in control of my choices, deeds, words or thoughts. I am the creator of my own vibrations, nobody else can create a vibration on my behalf. I am brutally honest with myself in that regard.

Photo by Brett Jordan on Pexels.com

So how about being a remarkable being and always do the right thing? Always send out the right (positive) vibrations. Always create positive ripples with every deed, thought or word.

Your tomorrow is a result of what you do, say or think today.

Guaranteed.

You write your own script.

Make it a good one.

***

The World Within

There exists a world within me to which I escape every day. It is an imaginary, but perfect world. It is a world I dream of. A world I want to see and experience for real. I have no doubt that my ideal world within will one day become a reality. It will take time, but it will happen as man evolves. This is my world within….

It is a lonely, but beautiful place. I use the word lonely, but I really mean to use the word solitude. I find peace and joy in solitude … far from the senseless existence of mankind. Or shall I say most of mankind. What is normal and acceptable for most is abnormal and unacceptable to me. I struggle to make sense of the existence of most people.

I see people smoking and I wonder what goes on in their minds. Do they think it is cool? Who would think it is cool? In my mind the only word that comes to mind is idiot when I see someone smoke. I can’t even look at them, because their actions are so ridiculously stupid. They have been given the blessing of life and they choose to destroy and pollute their bodies in this way? It is beyond comprehension.

Sure, I understand some people are mentally weaker than others or struggle with mental issues. They need the fix. I get that. However, by polluting their bodies, they are actually making their problem way worse than it originally was. The answer will be found in sober and healthy daily habits and rituals … not in negative and destructive behaviour. But that involves discipline, pride and hard work … it is so much easier to just light up and continue on the downward spiral. Then, when it is too late and all the damage has been done, they suddenly look for ways to live a more healthy life. What a pity. Only when they realize they are screwed, due to their own negative and destructive habits, do they finally find the drive to try to prolong their lives by adopting a healthy lifestyle.

It is too late then, isn’t it….?

I go within and visualize myself sharing a world with intelligent beings that are in control of themselves. It is a beautiful world where cigarettes does not even exist …  and won’t ever be tolerated. It is a world where we live in a clean and healthy way … where we respect our bodies and are grateful for the life given to us. Taking life for granted and abusing our bodies, would be equal to a criminal offense. It just does not happen in the beautiful world within.

I share a world with people where alcohol is king. The masses work all week, simply to drink all weekend. For the life of me, I cannot understand this mentality. Wine in moderation is fine … I am talking hard liquor here. I am talking alcohol consumption to the point of being drunk. I am talking about regular consumption of hard liquor even when not getting drunk. Is this how you appreciate your body? Is this how you show gratitude for the life you have been given … by polluting it with alcohol? Again, the words “beyond comprehension” comes to mind.

As your drinking buddies die off way too young, your reaction is to pour a drink and celebrate their wasted lives. I get it. The pennie didn’t drop for you. You will probably wait until it is too late and then try to undo the damage that you have done … if you get the chance. You might find then that damage to the body cannot be undone. The body is only tolerant for so long. Once it rebels, it rebels to the point of no return. The sad thing is that not only you will suffer when your body gives in. There are people who love and care for you who will have to witness your suffering and decline. Your kids may have to grow up without the parent they love so dearly. But let’s worry about that later when it is too late. Let’s live for the now. Pour another one, my friend.

I have written this on numerous occasions and I am going to say it again: On what sensible planet is alcohol even allowed? The leaders see innocent people being molested, attacked, raped, slaughtered in accidents and murdered by intoxicated people … and all they do about it is to pour another one. Yes, that’s the senseless planet we live on. It leaves me numb when I realize how we are thrown for the wolves by our leaders.

In the world within, I share a planet with sensible beings where we don’t tolerate the existence of alcohol or anyone who has a taste for it. We are sober and responsible. We don’t require artificial means to find joy in life. Feeling healthy, in control and sober is what gives us joy in life. Healthy living is our drug of choice.

In the world within, we don’t go on worldwide lockdown for a virus only … we go on a worldwide lockdown if any alcohol is detected anywhere on this planet. In the sensible and intelligent world within, we won’t let one person die or be negatively impacted by the existence of alcohol … no, we shut down the whole planet at the mere mention of the word alcohol, because we know that it is far more destructive than any virus.

In the world within we care about each and every person, plant and animal.

In the world within, we are sensible and responsible.

In the world within, anything capable of causing any person, animal or plant harm won’t be tolerated.

In the world within littering does not exist. The mere act of throwing anything unnatural down on the ground or out of a window, will be punishable by death. In my world within you don’t deserve to be on this planet if that is how you disrespect Mother Earth.

In the world within, alcohol and those with a taste for it, won’t be tolerated and does not exist.

In the world within, we are capable of clear and independent thought and live in harmony with every possible life form.

In the world within, noise does not exist and will not be tolerated. In the world within, the most beautiful sounds can be heard and they are all natural sounds of nature. No loud music. No loud people. No loud cars. In the world within, we are at peace and harmony with nature and the world we live in. To me, the three month hard lockdown period was the most amazingly fantastic period in my life. There was peace … silence … nature was allowed to flourish … no stupid people around. I enjoyed every single minute … in solitude … in beautiful nature … in absolute peace and solitude.

To me, hard lockdown was heaven.

To me, hard lockdown was the ideal world.

In the world within, we respect our bodies and are grateful for the life we have been blessed with.

I see cars and motorcycles evolving to be better, bigger and faster with the release of every new model. Cars gets more powerful and faster … and we demand the same. Although speed limits have been set and enforced, the majority of the low end cars on this planet are capable of going faster than the speed limits. There are one or two exceptions.

For some odd reason, that I cannot comprehend, we are trusting very irresponsible people to drive very powerful cars or motorcycles. The inevitable result is that people speed. People drive while intoxicated. People drive while being angry. So what happens then? Well, innocent people and animals die in their masses on a daily basis. We are so used to it that we just shake our heads and carry on in our destructive ways.

In the world within, it is a different matter altogether. In the world within, we drive cars that are programmed to only drive to the speed limit set on each respective road. In orderly fashion, cars follow one another all at the same speed, incapable of passing another car or going faster than the speed limit for the road it finds itself upon. Just like people in Japan, the cars go about their ways in orderly, considerate and safe manner. If they come within a certain distance of another car or obstacle, the car slows down automatically. No accidents can happen. No people or animals are killed on our roads. We live in a sane and rational world. The world within is where I find joy and experience how the ideal external world should be.

In the external world, I see a world full of criminals. They can’t even play sports without trying to con the referee into giving them an advantage over the other team. Integrity and fair play does not exist. They are shamefully and blatantly living a deceitful lifestyle. For the majority of you this is normal.

To me it is abnormal.

Ordinary, good people live in fear of criminals and have to take every precaution possible to prevent criminals from attacking them, robbing them, raping them or killing them. Innocent women and children are being kidnapped and used as sex slaves. Innocent animals are being murdered and tortured by bloodthirsty humans every day. We live in a horrific external world. The truth is that we actually live in the safest world ever. The circumstances were much worse earlier in the existence of humanity when nobody could be held accountable for the atrocities they committed. Nobody even knew about most of the incidents that took place, because we were not as connected and in touch as we are now. Even in this modern world, the situation is barbaric.

In the world within, crime cannot happen and if it does, we instantly know who the perpetrators were. In the world within there is no need for prisons. This can happen, because we all are injected with some kind of mechanism to track our every move. Even when you are only thinking bad thoughts, your blood and skin turns a different colour or an alarm is raised and you are removed from society. Let’s face it, only criminals or dishonest people will object to such a system. I couldn’t care less who is tracking my daily existence, because I have nothing to hide.

With this system, crime will simply seize to exist, because there is nowhere to hide. There can be no arguments or denial … only the cold hard truth and facts will exist. Criminals will get wiped out quickly and efficiently with zero tolerance, because there can be no doubt about their guilt. What a wonderful world the world within is. It is peaceful, orderly and crime free. Innocent people and children can walk the streets at any time of the day or night without fear of being attacked by evil monsters disguised as human beings. In the world within, you don’t have to lock your doors or worry about another human being. In the world within, you are safe and can live life in peace, harmony and enjoyment.

I see religion dividing the world into opposing groups. It causes the “them and us” mentality. “Them” are always wrong and “us” are always right. Wars gets fought in the name of religion. Terrorism occurs in the name of religion. Great injustice happens in the name of religion. This is true for all religions.

In the world within, I see a world free of religious intolerance and indoctrination. I see people embracing and loving each other, despite what religion they belong to. I see religion actually making better individuals of people and not worse, as is currently the case. I see everyone embracing one another and living in absolute peace and harmony, religious or not. I see good people walking the earth whom embrace others for the good people they are. I see people identifying with each other purely based on their behaviour … not because of the words they use.

In the world within, I see behaviour and character attracting people to one another … not their programmed beliefs … nor their skin color. I see people of all skin colours identifying with each other, because they display the same behaviour and character. The colour of your skin doesn’t feature in the world within. All I see is how you behave. In the world within racism doesn’t exist. Good people are drawn together, just like bad people are drawn together, no matter what the colour of their skins are.

The key word is behaviour.

In the world within I see little children been taught since birth to appreciate their bodies … to be grateful for the lives they have been given … to be respectful and tolerant of all other life forms, including animals and plants … to be orderly as they go about their daily business … to form neat and organized lines … to be well behaved and disciplined … to never make noise and disturb the natural harmony of the world … to be dignified in their daily behaviour … and to never litter or harm the natural world. They only leave footprints, nothing more. These life skills are more important than any other subject currently being taught at school. In the world within, we program kids to be remarkable beings. A similar system exist in Japan today. In the world within, I see humanity being raised to be compassionate, dignified and orderly beings … unlike the superficial and disrespectful idiots we raise today.

I go to the world within every day. I visualize the world I want to see. I feel the wonderful feeling of existing in such a pleasant and peaceful world, where we are truly evolved beings who actually deserve to be called humans. The world within is a beautiful one. It is a world where people are emotionally mature, dignified and peaceful. It is a world where animals are loved and cherished … and allowed to walk the earth freely without bloodthirsty hunters laying in wait for them.

The world within is one where people do not scream and shout and get involved in arguments. It is a world where you must qualify by virtue of the good person you are to have children. I have seen too many people abusing their little children by screaming and shouting at them and giving them physical punishment (most of these are religious people, programmed in this way). To this day, I have never physically punished my two children and never will. I have never even raised my voice to them. When we have a problem, we sort it out in a dignified and civilized way. To us, any behaviour other than a dignified one, is totally abnormal. We cannot understand it. We cannot associate with it.

The world within is much like you will imagine heaven to be … just a pleasant and amazing place to be day in and day out. No drama. No negativity. No violence. No criminals. No noise. Just beautiful natural sounds and a beautiful existence for all. Ever listened to the words of Imagine by John Lennon? The world within is something like that….

Now the funny thing is this:

We can have this beautiful imaginary world that exists within me for real on this planet.

Yes, we can have heaven on earth for real. It is actually so easy to achieve. It might take a few generations, but each generation will be better than the preceding one … and so we get better and better until we achieve the beautiful world within. As I sit here, I have no doubt that an evolved alien world would be like the world within me. I also have no doubt that we will have this beautiful world within 100 or 200 years from now. I have no doubt about that. It will come. We have already come a far way since just thirty years ago when people thought it was their right to smoke their disgusting (and may I add idiotic) cigarettes anywhere they wanted.

Imagine the progress we will make in another 100 years….

It is to the world within where I escape to almost every day when this world irritates me no end. It is the world within were I would rather be, than to go out and seek social interaction with humanity. It is in the solitude of my world within where I find peace and joy. It is in the world within where I feel comfort and at home. The senseless existence of humanity unsettles me. I don’t like it. I don’t like most humans. I don’t want to be part of it. I would rather stay at home and find peace and joy in my solitude and in my own world within.

In the world within, we are mindful and aware. Mindful and aware of everything and everyone. We are capable of clear and independent thought. We can think. We actually do think. If I park here, can other cars come out? If I do this, how will it affect another person, animal or plant? We are mindful and aware of even the simplest things in life. What a beautiful world within … where people can think … and are mindful and aware.

What a beautiful world exists within. It is the world many under evolved idiots will laugh at now and call me crazy, but which will become a reality in future. Too bad you and I won’t be here to experience it. Until then, I will rather continue to travel within and live in my own world within where I find most peace, joy and happiness.

It is a beautiful place.

A Remarkable Existence

Being a remarkable person, means that you have realised long ago that you share the streets with some very unremarkable beings. You are in the minority, period. It is a very unsettling reality to come to terms with. No, we are not talking skin color here.

You have also probably learnt to talk with them, rather than against them. It is a self preservation thing. Never has human stupidity been more highlighted than in 2020. I have seen and heard some things that left me numb with shock as I negotiated the treacherous 2020.

What can a man do amongst such an abundance of utter stupidity and blatant opportunistic parasitic existence?

Realize what you are dealing with. Adapt. Understand. Uplift. Survive. Most of all, be a good example. Stand out. Be remarkable. Lead by example. They will take notice and follow, eventually.

How do we do that?

The secret lies in the small things. Nobody cares about how successful you are or how rich you are. Being remarkable does not involve being rich, successful, good looking or having the best body. The most remarkable people I have ever met has been simple and simply good to the core.

Here is what I consider to be a remarkable existence:

1) Not needing alcholol to enjoy life. Not working all week simply to drink everything you have earned during the week away on weekends. Not romanticizing alcohol. In what utterly stupid world do we make songs about something as destructive as alcohol? A parasite makes songs about alcohol, because he/she tries to benefit from the disgusting drinking culture of the masses. It is beyond comprehension.

Something as destructive as alcohol should not even exist in a sensible world. Yes, it is not the alcohol, I hear you. It is the stupid people who use it. That’s the problem. We have to think for stupid people and regulate them. But they have rights, you say. The more stupid they are, the more rights they demand. Simply to continue to indulge in their destructive habits. The problem with their destructive habits is that innocent people mostly are the ones to suffer as a result.

Innocent people.

Innocent animals.

Kaching….

They are the ones who suffer, because we expect idiotic people to behave responsibly.

Kaching….

2) Stick to the speed limit.

Speed limits have been set for the benefit of all of the road users, yet you always get those inconsiderate idiots whom can’t be bothered. Even though I drive a very powerful Audi, I always drive it on speed control. The speed control is always set to the speed for the road I am on … even while driving in town. It frustrates me no end when I am driving perfectly on the speed limit and one inconsiderate idiot after the other forces me to pull to the left to let them by … and then mostly have the audacity to even say thank you. So stupid are they, that they have groups where they warn other road users where the speed cameras are…. And so, they compound the problem on the roads. How many innocent people have not died as a result?

I am sorry, I don’t understand this mentality.

How about just being a remarkable person and stick to the speed limit? Wouldn’t that simple act save lives and be to the benefit of all road users?

Such a small thing, but it will have such a profound effect on all of us. Simply be remarkable and stick to the speed limit.

3) Do the right thing, always.

You will often hear well spoken idiots use words like, “right for who?” Yes, they exist and they think they are very clever for trying to mindfuck everyone with their well-spoken rubbish. Let’s ignore these fools. The simple reality is that you don’t need to be a genius to understand that any action that will benefit the greater good of all life forms, is “the right thing” to do. In the same way, any action that causes any life form harm or inconvenience in any way, is the wrong thing to do.

If it is not yours, don’t take it.

If it is not your wife, don’t flirt with her.

When nobody is watching, that’s when you really have to do the right thing … because the Universe is watching and the Universe will give you exactly what you give out … with interest. You really write your own script. You predict your tomorrow by what you are doing today … so make sure it is the right thing. Pure and simple.

It is good to remember to adopt a lifestyle that is in harmony with the Universe. Simply be a good and kind person. Respect nature and every little life form. Be responsible and respectful of everyone and everything. Don’t litter. Don’t steal or deceive.

4) Walk away.

You will have to deal with idiots every single day. They are so lowly evolved that trouble will follow them around. Stupid people will react to them and ignite an explosive situation. Sensible people will walk away from them and not give them a second thought. Really the best way to deal with trouble makers is to ignore their existence, not acknowledge them and to completely cut them from your life. That’s the ultimate insult, right there. Don’t spare them a thought. Don’t acknowledge them in any way. The only way you can give trouble makers or energy vampires any power, is to acknowledge them, engage with them and react to them. By walking away and not acknowledging their existence, you simply render them totally incompetent and insignificant.

If an incident happens on the roads somewhere, simply take the next exit and drive away from the negative situation. Why would you engage with someone in an explosive situation? Do you really think any good can come from such actions? Stupid people engage. Wise people take the next exit.

Simply walk away … or drive away.

5) Treat everybody with respect.

The sign of a truly good person is someone who makes even the poorest person feel respected. Leave them with a smile on their face and joy in their heart by treating them with respect and dignity. Of course they must deserve to be respected and treated with dignity by displaying positive and harmonious behaviour. I won’t even acknowledge a drunk, trouble maker, someone who litters or makes a noise. I don’t look at them. I don’t acknowledge them. They don’t deserve my attention. You only deserve my respect, attention and to be treated with dignity if you display sober habits and behave in a harmonious manner.

To be treated as a human, you must behave like a human. It is no use that you look like a human, but behave in a barbaric, opportunistic or destructive manner. I can only consider you a human if you respect all life forms … most of all if you respect your own body and the life you have been given.

I consider poor people, who displays sober, peaceful and harmonious lifestyles as the most remarkable beings on this planet.

I bow to you.

6) Live with integrity.

I have met utterly deceitful people who are convinced that they live life with integrity. Yes, they are delusional and out if touch with reality. They really suffer from some kind of a mental disorder.

The proof is in the pudding.

Your actions always reveal the truth, no matter how dilusional your words and beliefs are. I always only look at behaviour … words are superficial and useless to me. What you do or don’t do, displays your integrity or lack thereof.

To lead a life with integrity, simply means you do the right thing at all times and this ties in nicely with point 3 above.

7) Play sports with utter integrity.

It is beyond my comprehension how modern day sportsmen will still do anything to illegally gain an advantage or to win a game. Honour and integrity can only be seen in a very select few sportsmen. That these people are allowed to openly display blatant attempts to deceive the referee, is unfathomable. What message does this send to our children … that is is OK to be deceitful and dishonest?

You will also still see sportsmen with thug like mentality bad mouthing their opponents or sledging them in an effort to gain an advantage over them and throw their concentration off. How can this be allowed in this modern day? Are we barbaric like that? How can we even begin to respect people like this?

I am very sure their on field behaviour will also reflect in their daily behaviour away from the sports fields. If you are deceitful, aggressive and dishonest on field, you surely are the same off the field.

Doesn’t say much about them, does it?

8) Don’t cheat on your partner.

Now this one requires a special kind of feelingless person. To be committed to a person and look him/her in the eye while cheating behind their backs, is probably the worst possible action that can be taken by anyone. The level of deceit is equal to high treason towards your country. Being able to look your life partner in the eye and tell them you love him/her while you are cheating on them, is the ultimate act of disrespect and deceit. In my eyes only a criminal will be able to pull this off.

This also goes for single people whom are having affairs with married people. It is simply not on. Don’t do it. It is disgusting, wrong and nasty. The amount of negative energy a cheater draws into their lives by indulging in such negative and destructive behaviour will be the cause of dire results for the cheater at some stage in their lives. Nothing goes unpunished. What you give out into the Universe, is what you will get back.

I would rather immediately end my current relationship or marriage if I feel the need to be with someone else. That’s the honourable and right thing to do.

9) Be the best you can be.

Up to seven years ago, I was overweight and unhealthy. I was very miserable as a result. For the past seven years I am always in top shape, very healthy, happy and confident.

I feel on the top of my game in every possible way since I decided to always be the best version of myself. It takes total dedication, focus and discipline. The paybacks are enormous. I feel confident, strong and in control of my life. Positive and good things are attracted to me, because I am the best version of myself.

Just the simple act of taking care of yourself and being the best version of yourself, sends such a strong message out into the Universe that you are grateful for your body and the life you have been given. The Universe responds by sending you good and positive things and people.

10) Don’t bunch or form a line across a passage.

Such a simple act that displays your level of order, instead of chaos. It displays your level of consideration for others and ability to think and not be like a sheep, incapable of clear and logic thought.

I have been confronted many a time with situations where I approached a shop or bank in a mall where a que has formed. In the absence of a representative of that institution, people will invariably just create a line straight across the passage … and not along a wall in a nice orderly, considerateand disciplined manner.

No, they have to form a line right across the fucking passage, creating total chaos and obstruction.

When confronted with situations like these, I simply turn around and walk away and come back at another time when less people are in the shops. I would feel utterly embarrassed to stand in a line that goes across a passage. I would feel like a total idiot, because that’s something only idiots would do.

Such a simple thing, but it says such a lot about you.

Pay attention to detail. Do simple little things like this in an orderly and disciplined manner. You will be amazed how simple attention to detail and consideration of others will positively impact your life. It is all about the messages you send into the Universe. Either you send the message I am an idiotic sheep into the Universe … or I can think. I am orderly and disciplined.

I can tell you now that such a simple thing will tell me how you lead your life in general too. It says something about your mentality.

Remarkable people do the small and simple things right.

Be remarkable.

You got this

Every 365 (sometimes 366) days, we have a chance to start over … to hit the refresh button. The majority of us will make firm resolutions for the new year and never stick to it beyond the first weeks or months of the new year. You see, what they forgot to do was to realize that each and every item on their list will require sheer discipline and dedication to achieve. Most of us lack that willpower and discipline. It is easier just to be everything you don’t want to be. Easier to be overweight or fat. Easier to be unfit and unhealthy. Easier to indulge in the unhealthy stuff as if you have no control over yourself. Easier to be uneducated. Easier to be unhappy and accept things as they have become. Easier to accept second best. Easier to make every excuse in the book. Easier to simply stay in your miserably unhappy relationship. Easier to justify your unhealthy lifestyle by saying stupid things like, “You have one life, eat the cake.” It is always the unhealthy and out of shape person that will create problems out of solutions by saying things like, “what about cholesterol?” when an obviously very healthy person, who have lived a certain lifestyle for a number of years, tries to help them adopt a healthier lifestyle. See, that’s the mentality of the masses out there. It is easier to convince yourself why you should not be disciplined and lead a healthy lifestyle. You (as the unhealthy and overweight one) will make senseless (and blatantly stupid) arguments like “what about the cholesterol?” when an in shape and very healthy person tries to help improve the quality of your life.

It is too easy to be fat, unhealthy and miserably unhappy.

It is so sad to see how people display their lack of gratitude for the life they have been given, in this way.

The truth is: You have one life, make sure you make the most of it by being healthy and disciplined. Be in control, rather than being controlled by all the wrong habits.

Until 2014, I was one of the above.

It is not a good place to be in life. Being content with mediocrity, unhappiness and second best is never a good thing. Why would you want to waste your life like that? You have been given one life in your current state and body … don’t take it for granted. Show your gratitude, by making the most of it. Most people live their lives in a constant state of unhappiness and unfulfillment. Secretly, they constantly long for something more … something better than they currently have. Someone they don’t currently have. Yet they neglect to shape themselves into that person capable of attracting or achieving better than they currently have … or the type of person their heart really longs for.

Too hard and complicated, you say?

I beg to differ. It is actually so easy to achieve.

All you need to do is to make a list of the ten or twenty (or thirty) core goals, you wish to achieve or experience in life. Know that this list will change as you tick the items off, but you will (or should) always have core goals to achieve. It is, however, not as easy as simply making a list … no, that won’t do. Although it is an important step in the process, you need to go deeper … much deeper. Superficial actions won’t cut it.

Give that list serious thought and then commit it to paper. Write them down and streamline them. Now you have a base to work from. What many people do then, is to stick this list on a wall or door where they can see it every day. Despite doing that, they don’t even see the list anymore after two or three weeks … it simply becomes part of the furniture. That won’t do will it? As I said, you gotta go in deep to achieve the good stuff.

Nope, you gotta step up your game. Let me teach you how. This is how I do it:

I have a list if core goals that has been part of my life for a good seven years. This list has changed of course, but some long term items remain thereon, although I have already made excellent progress towards achieving it. I review the list at the end of every year and implement a new (revised) list at the start of each year.

Once I have that list in place, I begin the process of committing each item to my memory. I want to see that list clearly in my mind at any moment of every day. I would walk around in the neighborhood, pretending to exercise, but actually reciting my list over and over. I would drink coffee and recite my list. I would drive my car and recite my list. I would lay in bed before bed-time and fall asleep, busy reciting my list. If I forget something, I will look at the written list. This happens a lot. So, I go on and on until that list is totally ingrained into my head. I can see it. I can scroll through it at any time of the day or night. It has become part of me. It is not stuck against a wall or door somewhere where I see it a few times per day…. Nope, it is ingrained in my mind. It is part of me every moment if the day.

With time, each number on my list gets associated with something particular I wish to achieve. So, just by thinking about a certain number, the goal associated with that number immediately jumps out at me … effortlessly. It has become second nature.

To make matters easier, each number gets permanently associated with a certain core goal, i.e. #1 always relates to my desired income. So, the only thing that changes every year, is how much I want to make on average every month for that year … but #1 always is associated with my desired income. In the same way, #9 always refers to my physical appearance and how I continuously strive to be fitter, better, stronger and look better, younger and healthier than I did yesterday. At age 55, I feel I am getting better in every possible way with each passing day. My life is on a physical upward graph … not on a natural decline as most people expect and accept it to be. No dude, we are pushing the boundaries and continuously moving the goal post. Ordinary and mundane is not part of the script … and that is why #12 always reminds me that, “I am remarkable, every day in every way.” So, every action, thought and word serves the purpose of displaying how remarkable I am. Every day, in every way. This is not an ego trip. This is being the best I can be. This is about being the example I want everyone to follow. Don’t say it, do it.

I recite this list (mine has sixteen core goals) every single day … sometimes more than once per day. I reinforce and affirm those core goals every single day, whether I am out strolling through the neighbourhood or sipping on a cuppa. I make time for this. It is a critical part of my day. If I don’t do this, I feel I am disassociating myself from my core goals and by doing so, I won’t ever achieve them. So, the key is to reinforce and affirm them every single day.

Now, understand this: It is no use to have core goals (sixteen, in my case) if you don’t also understand that each one requires certain actions before you can achieve them. It is no use that I walk around and recite #8, “My dream woman is always by my side,” but I don’t understand how I must change my behaviour to attract exactly this person into my life. How can I expect my dream woman to be drawn to me, when I am not the dream man? So, each core goal, requires understanding of what is required to achieve the goal and how I must live my life to ensure exactly that. When I recite this particular goal (#8) I always realise that I must behave like the dream man every single day … otherwise I won’t be able to draw in that magical dream woman I am dreaming of. I make mistakes … sure I do. I have moments of weakness, where I do quite the opposite from what I know I should be doing. That’s fine. I scold myself and show genuine remorse by not repeating those mistakes. That’s the power of the list in my mind, because I know I have to take one step in the right direction for each of my core goals every single day. When I make mistakes in a moment of weakness, I realise immediately that I took a step backward … not a step forward. That feeling of failure is so energy draining and deflating, that I dread repeating the same mistake. By the same token, making the right micro decisions every day (like not eating that little cookie) on a regular basis, rewards me with so much energy, drive and sense of achievement, that it drives me forward towards each of my goals with passionate ease.

You see, my list is so ingrained in my mind, that every action … every thought … every word must be in line with these sixteen core goals. It is fascinating how the correct daily behaviours (rituals), the correct thoughts, the correct deeds, just propel you to bigger and better things every single day. By the end of the day, I am so excited and pumped when I have taken even half a step forward towards each one of my sixteen core goals. The next day offers me the opportunity to take another step (or half a step) forward. After seven days, I am seven step towards each of my desired goals. I don’t look back and wish I got started seven days ago … no, I look back and see that I have already taken seven steps towards each goal. That sense of achievement creates an irresistible energy and drive within me. That’s how you do it. You don’t put anything off. If it can wait for tomorrow to get started, then you are never going to achieve that goal, sorry.

Winners and achievers make no excuses … they do.

Losers and non-achievers postpone, justify their current lifestyle and lack the passion and discipline to ever be better than what they have become (due to their own actions) … and so the downward spiral continues.

Don’t procrastinate … DO!

It does happen that sometimes the Universe simply throws a spanner in the works. So reciting #14 “I travel overseas twice a year,” is useless at certain times … i.e. March 2019 to present. The Corona Virus simply threw us all a curveball. The goal could not be achieved due to any fault by myself. The Universe simply had other plans for all of us. Does that mean #14 gets less attention or gets removed from my core goals? Nope. Even though I could not travel, I researched and dreamt of where I would travel once it was safe to do so. The passion remained. External forces cannot derail my goals … only my own lack of commitment, focus or passion can derail whatever I want to achieve. I am the master of my own life. I write my own script. Sure, sometimes external forces plays a role in delaying or altering my path, but ultimately, I am the one in charge.

I will achieve every goal … and then I will shift the goal posts. So, when I achieve something, like attracting my dream woman into my life, I will change #8 to making sure I keep and cherish my dream woman. The focus will then change from attracting her to keeping her. This will ensure that I constantly will strive to be even more of a dream man than ever before. The moment you let go of that core goal once it has been achieved, you can only change the constant upward curve to a negative and downward one. There is nothing more sad than to see that happen. You gotta be “wake up,” focussed and passionate until the day you leave this planet. You have no one, but yourself, to blame if you end up losing whatever you worked so hard to achieve.

It is a permanent lifestyle … not a temporary commitment.

So, once you have committed your core goals to paper … and then copied the same into your memory, the key is to live it. Every day, every moment. Every thought. Every action. Every word. Everything you do, think and say must be in line with whatever your core goals are. You cannot sit back and hope the desired income will flow in … no, you will have to work hard and passionately to ensure that happens. You will have to acquire certain new skills and always do everything to the best of your ability. You cannot hope to be better and fitter and more good looking than yesterday if you don’t exercise, say no to the cookie and lead a healthy lifestyle today. What you give today, is what you get tomorrow. Simple.

Live it.

Be it.

Recite your core goals. Then understand what daily actions (or rituals) are required to achieve each and every one of them. Then take those small daily steps forward every day simply by doing, thinking, saying and being all the right things that will bring you to that desired goal.

Live it.

Be it.

One step forward, every single day.

This is where the magic starts to happen.

Astounding things will happen. By sheer chance, certain things will simply fall into place. The right people get drawn into your life. The right circumstances will be given to you. The right sequence of events will happen. Whatever you need to achieve certain goals, will be given to you. Don’t think about it … trust the process. Your actions, intentions, thoughts, words and deeds must – however – be pure, constructive and positive if you wish to have positive outcomes. No use, I recite #4 “I experience happiness, good luck and prosperity every day,” when my thoughts, deeds, words an actions sends out the opposite message into the Universe. Your deeds, thoughts, words and behavior are the stronger expression of what you really desire and deserve … so make sure you do what you say. Make sure you are whatever you want to be.

Live it.

Be it.

You are the author of your own script. You must simply dig deep, live it and be it. Every day, every moment. Be your remarkable self, every day in every way. You can be like fine wine … better looking … fitter … healthier … tastier … happier … more prosperous … more remarkable … the older you get.

Live it.

Be it.

You got this.

***

Please hit the Follow button below.

Being Spiritual

I started life as any South African child did. I was born and raised in a strict Christian home. I had no say in the matter. When I became aware of my surroundings, things like reading from the Bible, praying before meals, praying before bed-time, believing in Jesus and going to church every Sunday were solidly part of my every day life. We were – of course – also brainwashed that other religions are wrong and that they all would go to hell. They were the enemy and they were wrong. We were the chosen ones and we were right. In that way, beautiful and innocent little minds were programmed from birth to have the “them and us” mentality.

Yes, it is unfathomable that people can do this to their innocent children.

In this way – even in this modern world – beautiful and innocent little minds gets destroyed and polluted from birth. Most will never be able to break free from the brainwashing and indoctrination. The aim is to instill good core values into children. The actual result is that people are being split into opposing groups and most will become incapable of clear, independent and logical thought.

The word abuse comes to mind.

I only realised later in life that we were already split into opposing groups at birth. This is where the “them and us” mentality comes in. Our parents, the school system, religious leaders and the government were responsible for programming us in this way. The same happened in every religious group in every country all over the world. Every religion taught their newborn children the very same thing. We are right … they are wrong.

See the problem in this picture?

All of them believed in one God and all of them professed that this one God was speaking through them. If that was true, then the bottom line was simply that the one God – whom all were praying to – was giving opposing messages to each religion … thereby consciously creating opposing groups. Is that not a fair conclusion to come to? That’s the logical conclusion, indeed. That doesn’t reflect well on God, does it? Now that’s a problem for me. Even within each religion, you will find multiple denominations, all with different views. In the absence of the “one God” who is supposedly speaking through all the religious leaders, the reality is that each religious leader creates their own following by preaching his own doctrine or variation of the parent doctrine. By doing this, there is no consensus. There is no “one God” leading mankind along the same path … nope, mankind has hijacked God’s name and created thousands of religions or different versions thereof. Why? Three reasons.

  1. There is no one God in control of all mankind.
  2. Religion was created by man.
  3. It is all about money and control. In short, it is a huge business.

One God, but so many different religions … and so many variations within each. If you step back and actually think about it, you will realize how utterly shameful and ridiculous this is. Humanity has taken something beautiful and made a mockery of it. They have made God’s name cheap and laughable. They have turned the God of Love into something ugly and superficial.

You see, what the above picture caused was for me to doubt God and his intentions. Religion was simply tainting his name. I did not like what I was discovering as time went by. I had to learn that God is God and that religion was man-made. The two could not be linked together logically. Religion and the behaviour of its followers simply tainted God’s name. It is common knowledge that the ugliest (not in a physical way), delusional, most judgemental and most incapable of clear and independent thought, are the religious minds. Just look at incidents making the news headlines all over the world on a regular basis….

The facts cannot be disputed.

Yes, all of these violent and murderous people are praying to the one and the same God and are finding their inspiration and justification in their religious texts. No one religion does not have blood on its hands. The problem is not only limited to certain religions. You can argue that religion has created monsters out of otherwise innocent and good people. This statement cannot be faulted. The facts are there for all to see. No well spoken argument can deny or erase the cold, hard facts.

I completely lost my appetite for religion and religious people. It seemed to me that the ugliest people you could find was the religious ones. I could not associate myself with their superficial and delusional existence. Simply put, they don’t know God. They are religious, yes … and they say all the right things (but mostly do the opposite), but they don’t know God. Their behaviour and character makes that clear.

You see, knowing God is to be simply beautiful at heart, kind, uncomplicated, tolerant, peaceful, harmonious, respectful and loving towards all life forms. God is not something ugly. God is something pure and beautiful. Most religious people do not know God, period. All they know is their programmed beliefs, forced upon them by others. Being religious means to be at the very bottom of your spiritual journey.

I needed to be guided by God. It held no appeal for me that a self chosen human being was trying to force his interpretations and beliefs onto vulnerable people. That’s effectively what is happening all over the world. There is no consensus. It became clear that people had hijacked God and turned his image into a less than flattering one for their own gain and to enhance their own agenda.

I wanted purity. I wanted a deep and real connection. Being led by another human being was never going to work for me. I anguished long and hard about this. I read up on all religions and sects. I have a library filled with books dealing with all religions. Each religion has beautiful teachings (amongst all the immoral and bloody stories) … and I have embraced those beautiful teachings from each.

As time went by, I became spiritual, not religious. What does that mean?

The first thing being spiritual means, is to not see the need to debate the matter and try to convince or convert people to my point of view. Only religious people will debate the matter and try to “win your soul” for their respective religion. A spiritual person will love you and live in harmony with you regardles of your beliefs. A spiritual person will respect your beliefs. A spiritual person will love you no matter what your sexual preference is. A spiritual person will just be and let be.

Just be kind.

Just be loving and pure.

Just be peaceful.

Just be compassionate.

Just be uncomplicated.

Spiritual simply means I live my life in a Godly fashion. No religious talk. I simply strive to lead a good and pure lifestyle every day of my life. Spiritual means action speaks louder than words. There are no paybacks. I lead a good life, because I have good core values. I don’t have to justify why I lead a good life. I simply do. That is who I am … a good person for no reason at all. There is no promise of a heaven for me. I can’t be bothered by such talk.

The idea that I must advertise my God and win souls for him, is simply too shallow for me. Think about it: if you have to advertise your God, he/she is really not as big and powerful as you may think. I would argue that such actions actually belittles your God. A powerful and visible God will need no advertisement, testimony or winning of souls. Ridiculous, isn’t it? I want something real and deep. You cannot get more real and deep, than just being a good person for no reason at all. That is being real. No pretence. No acting like I am a good person simply for the delusion of a passage to heaven.

Spiritual means to lead a Godly lifestyle.

Being spiritual is to love and care for every form of life. It means doing the right thing when nobody is watching. It means giving without the thought of ever receiving. It means to live in harmony with the earth and everything on it. It means to be dignified in your behaviour even in the most trying circumstances.

Being spiritual is to see your body as your temple and to only feed it with good and pure foods and drinks. It means living a healthy lifestyle. It means being fit and active. It means being disciplined and in control of yourself. It means to be an example for everyone in who you are … your behaviour … your appearance … your lifestyle. Being spiritual means to live it, not say it.

Being spiritual is for those able to live life on the next level. Being religious is entry level. Being spiritual is a high level of being. Some would call spiritual people names, like atheist. They mean it in a derogatory manner, but the fact is that atheists are more Godly in behavior than any religious person. All the atheists I know are beautiful, kind and peaceful people. All of them are very intellectual. To me, being called atheist is a compliment, even though I would rather describe myself as being spiritual, not religious.

Being spiritual is to not hide behind the convenient “God will forgive” me mentality while you consciously lead an unhealthy, immoral and shady lifestyle. Being spiritual is to own up to our mistakes and behaviour and to always strive to better ourselves. Being spiritual is not for the weak minded. It is for strong, disciplined people with true integrity. It is for people who actually live a Godly life, not for those just talking a good religious talk, but then actually doing the opposite.

Being spiritual is to be kind and respectful to the poorest person. Being spiritual is to rather take a different path or retreat, than to cause a bird to take flight where it is peacefully sitting on a branch. Being spiritual is to have a deep awareness and to live in harmony with everything and everyone.

Now that’s next level, isn’t it?

Being spiritual is to avoid making loud noises and disturbing the sounds of nature. Being spiritual is to respect every person and his or her beliefs and never to make derogatory comments about their beliefs. Being spiritual is to not be homofobic … to not see the colour of people’s skins … to do things unconditionally for others and keep it a secret … no ego driven public announcements.

Being spiritual is to live and let live.

Being spiritual is to see the character and soul of a person, rather than their skin colour.

Being spiritual is for enlightened beings, free of religious indoctrination. Being spiritual is real, raw and deep. It is pure living. A spiritual person will only ever kill an animal if truly hungry … and when he does, he will apologise to the animal and thank it for sacrifising it’s life to ensure your survival. Bloodthirsty recreational hunters are mostly religious. They enjoy hunting and killing … for recreational purposes only. A spiritual person can never kill an animal for enjoyment, period. In fact, killing an animal would be the absolute last resort and only out if necessity. Even then, the spiritual person would be emotionally distraught about the loss of animal life.

I can liken being spiritual to Buddhism. It really is much the same thing. The principles of Karma applies in both cases. A simple, uncomplicated and beautiful lifestyle is what we embrace. Buddhism goes in very deep … even deeper than most spiritual people will ever dwell. For that reason, being spiritual is less complicated and free of teachings and rituals. It really is just to be….

A spiritual person cannot cheat on his/her partner. We cannot lie. We cannot live a life that is anything, but with integrity. We cannot become involved in affairs. We cannot do anything that will cause harm, loss, hurt or emotional distress to anyone else. It is real and honest living. Real and honest being. We understand the art of harmonious living and being. Even throwing a rock into a dam and causing alarm to any life form in the water, will be hard to do for a spiritual person. We just want everyone and everything to be at peace. Why cause ripples where there is a smooth and peaceful reflection on the water? Maintain the beauty and the peace. Avoid causing ripples. This goes for every facet of our lives.

Yes indeed, being spiritual is to have awareness of everyone and everything and the state they find themselves in. A conscious awareness is central to our existence.

Spiritual people cannot hate or feel anger. They are dignified beings. To them, having a lot or having nothing is the same. There is no greed or desire to be part of the rat race.

Being spiritual is to lead a healthy, meaningful, constructive and harmonious life.

We live it. We don’t say it.

God = Universe.

***

Please hit the Follow button below if you would like to be notified when I publish new content.

***

Stuttering Joe – My true life story (#001)

My earliest memory is where I am running down a street on a very hot day … bare feet on the hot tar road … the huge frame of Aunty Stinkalot chasing after me, shouting all the way that I should stop and go back home. I was only five at the time, but a feisty five at that. I maintained a good ten-metre gap between myself and my pursuer … until I got fed up with her efforts to catch me.

When Aunty Stinkalot showed no signs of giving up the chase, I stopped in my tracks, picked up three rocks from the pavement … and attacked! 

The chaser became the chasee.

When the first rock flew past her huge frame and Aunty Stinkalot saw me advancing, like I meant business, she lost all her nerve and fled. Without thinking, I might have thrown a swear word in there … just to show her that I meant business. 

Rude and disrespectful, I know. But that was the kind of language and behaviour I was exposed to at that time; I simply didn’t know any better. I grew up on the wrong side of the track and we were bred rough and tough in downtown Despatch. Ask anybody from nearby Port Elizabeth and they would tell you that the Despatch people were a species on their own. We were known as “klipgooiers.” In English that would translate to “rock throwers.” Even the people from the other side of the railway lines, looked at us with a wary eye. We were all Despatch people … but there was a clear social class divide between the downtown Despatch people and the uptown Despatch people. I guess Hillbillie would be a good way to describe us downtown folk. Where there was a fight, you could be sure a Despatch downtown resident would be involved. I am sure things have changed over the years, but back then Despatch people – particularly the downtown bunch – were a fearsome bluecollar community.

I cannot recall that I stuttered at all when I used swear words to get rid of Aunty Stinkalot, but then, that became a lifelong trend for me. To this day, I stutter on all words… except swear words. For that simple reason, I began to employ swear words to help me get through difficult sentences or circumstances.

Amusingly so!

Paradoxically, swear words became my safety net that I used – not to deliberately swear or express my anger – but to make communication easier for me. Luckily, most people realised it.

Even Reverend Charl found it very amusing at times. He would even encourage me to use swear words when I got stuck on a word. He found it very endearing and he understood why I followed that route in an effort to communicate more fluently.

Back to Aunty Stinkalot: 

Being as big as she was, her escape happened in slow motion. I could walk casually and still keep up with her. I remember finding her huge fleeing bum amusing … drilling from fat and rhythmically moving from side to side in an over exaggerated fashion with each step she took – like two giant bags filled with water. I was tempted to land a rock on her bum. I knew I could not miss, and I dare say she would not even have felt anything with all those layers of fat as protection, but sanity prevailed and I deliberately aimed the next two rocks just to her left or right … just enough to scare her off.

My tactic worked.

Even at that young age, I instinctively realised that attack was the best form of defence. Aunty Stinkalot promised me a hiding when I got home later … and I did get that hiding. Not from her, but from my mother, Ma Molly. But that didn’t prevent me from doing the very same thing over and over again. Let’s be honest, a hiding from Ma Molly was not something any child would have feared. You would pretend more than actually feel anything.

Was I a naughty child?

No, far from it.

I was actually a very good boy.

I regularly ran away from Ma Molly’s house simply because I missed my father and nothing would stop me – not Aunty Stinkalot, nor regular hidings and threats. When I missed my dad, I didn’t wait around, think about it or allow anything to prevent me from going to his house. Yet, strangely enough, I do not have any memory of my dad during this time. The reason for that will become clear as my story unfolds.

I am told that my father and Ma Molly got divorced when I was four years old. Apparently, one of our neighbours suffered from cancer. Ma Molly – being a simple and good-hearted farm girl – went out of her way to help them and make their burden easier to carry. Amongst other things, she regularly cooked supper for them. To cut a long story short, the neighbour eventually died and Ma Molly was rewarded in the cruellest of ways for everything she did for them, when his widow, Aunty Belinda, stole my father from her. So much for doing good deeds….

My father gave new meaning to ‘love thy neighbour’.

My broken-hearted mother was forced to move to my father’s other house some three kilometres away, with her five children. My father stayed behind in his house and Aunty Belinda moved in with him. Ma Molly’s world crumbled around her; she was devastated. For Ma Molly, it was tears and heartache every day, while, for my father, it was butterflies, passionate sex and the excitement of a new love in his life. To rub salt into Ma Molly’s wounds, I ran away to the very people who broke her heart, and all that meant was that she had to see my father and his new girlfriend more than she needed or wanted to, thereby increasing her pain and trauma tenfold. I was totally ignorant of the pain I caused Ma Molly. For this reason, Ma Molly asked Aunty Stinkalot – who was home all day – to be on the lookout for me and to prevent me from making unscheduled visits to my dad’s house.

I remember employing various tactics to get past the ever vigilant Aunty Stinkalot, who even recruited her more mobile domestic worker to try to stop me. At times, I simply walked casually down the street. I had to go past Aunty Stinkalot’s house. When she saw me coming, she stumbled to the pavement and ordered me back to my house. The sight of her formidable frame blocking my way didn’t put me off. I confidently walked right up to her, and, when I was about three metres from her, I suddenly exploded into action by taking off as quickly as I could. I was quite fast and agile as a child. 

It was a total mismatch.

Aunty Stinkalot had no chance. 

Before she could even think about reacting, I was past her and on my way to my father. All she could do then was to call after me, plead with me and threaten me … none of which worked. She quickly learnt to stop chasing me after I attacked her – and her domestic worker – with rocks on a few occasions.

On other occasions, I started running as soon as I stepped out onto the pavement in front of our house. I easily covered the fifty metres to Aunty Stinkalot’s house before she could cover the eight metres from her porch to the pavement. It became a big joke to me. I often laughed loudly as I sped past her.

Sometimes, I had no intention of going to my father’s house, but still pretended to do so just to have fun with Aunty Stinkalot. I often used the low boundary walls along the street as cover to stalk up to Aunty Stinkalot’s house. Then, when I got to her gate, I waited until she nodded off, where she sat on the porch, before I crept up to her and shouted, “Bah!

I was so paralysed with laughter that she almost caught me on a few occasions.

I loved having fun with Aunty Stinkalot!

Neither she nor her domestic worker ever succeeded in catching me or prevented me from going to my father’s house. They had the bulk – I had the mobility – and they simply didn’t stand a chance, more so, because I was so fearless and confident.

***

Ma Molly is a very simple person. She grew up in the farming community of Steytlerville, where my grandparents, Grandma Fran and Grandpa Jacob, farmed all their lives. Not being academically inclined, Ma Molly struggled through school – always in the special class – and dropped out when she was sixteen. Jobs were very scarce in the small town of Steytlerville, so Ma Molly moved to Uitenhage (adjacent to Despatch), where she quickly found a job. As luck would have it, she met my very handsome father on the train, while both were travelling to Uitenhage. They eventually got married and had five children. I was born on 7 December 1965. I was the second youngest of the siblings.

Neither my younger brother nor I have any memory of Ma Molly and my father being together. When we were old enough to comprehend what was going on, we were living with Ma Molly and only saw our father every second weekend – apart from me, of course. I spent a lot of time with my father and Aunty Belinda, because I made it happen with my running away sessions.

I am told that my father was the only one in his large family who had a stuttering problem, and that I somehow inherited or developed the same problem, although to a much worse degree than he ever had. I really do not know when I first realised that I stuttered. I guess it was just part of life for me at first, and I certainly cannot remember that it bothered me during those early years. Two of my siblings also have a very slight stutter, while the other two are totally fluent. I was the one that got it really bad.

Although my father had a new love and bed-warmer in his life, he wanted his bread buttered on both sides. He played mind games with Ma Molly by promising her that he would come back to her and the kids.

She believed him.

Her resistance crumbled.

They had sex.

He never came back.

This scenario repeated itself over and over … and over again. 

Every time, Ma Molly’s hopes were raised by my father’s empty promises and, every time, he didn’t honour the promises he made to her in the heat of passion.

In this way, my father kept both Ma Molly and Aunty Belinda’s beds warm simultaneously. He might also have kept a few other beds warm at the same time – after all, he was a very handsome man … and rumour has it that the women made it clear that they adored him. 

***

At age five, our immediate neighbours formed a big part of my life; in fact, they were the only people I knew, apart from my family. 

Aunty Stinkalot and her family lived two houses to our left. The family comprised of Aunty Stinkalot, the huge mother with the foul, sweaty stench. Uncle Tiny Tony was her very small husband. He was half her size. Being a railway worker with absolutely no ability to get promoted, Uncle Tiny Tony earned a very low salary. They were the poorest family in the neighbourhood. They never had a car, and walked or took a bus to where they wanted to go.

Aunty Stinkalot was treated as if she had the plague by everyone in the neighbourhood, because of the stench that accompanied her. It was rumoured that God was punishing you for something when Aunty Stinkalot plodded her huge frame down next to you in church. Many breath-holding records were attempted in this way, and many unofficial world records were set, but, sooner or later, you had to breathe … and, when you did, the pungent smell threatened to make you faint. At such times, it was impossible to concentrate on anything the reverend was saying. Your survival instincts just naturally kicked in … and getting through the sixty to ninety minutes spent in church – alive or barely alive – was all you could focus on. Nothing helped … not even the most sincere promises to God if he could just make the smell disappear or render you incapable of smelling anything for an hour and a half, or if he could miraculously make you disappear and re-appear elsewhere in the church – very far from Aunty Stinkalot. 

There was no such luck. 

When God decided he was going to punish you, he made Aunty Stinkalot your ‘church buddy’. Suddenly, she started to search you out week after week in church, wherever you might be hiding.

First, you heard the shuffling footsteps … then you saw the big shadow … then everyone moved out of the way or suddenly had to go to the toilet … until only you were sitting there totally at her mercy, alone and God-forsaken. Then the benches creaked as she squashed through them until her huge frame plodded down next to you, making you bounce up a good ten centimetres or so … and, when you landed back on the bench, Aunty Stinkalot shifted closer to you and made herself comfy and cosy, with her one huge breast on top of your head, pinning you down for the duration of the church service. This position gave you maximum exposure to her appalling smell. 

You knew God had a quarrel with you when this happened … big time!

Needless to say, I very often found myself in this horrible situation. 

It was as if Aunty Stinkalot favoured sitting next to me because they lived close to us and because Ma Molly was one of the few people who were friendly to her. Or maybe I just deserved to be punished for something, like running away to my dad’s house.

God didn’t seem to be very amused that I prayed to him to make the church service pass by quickly, either. For this, he seemed to punish me by letting Aunty Stinkalot make a nuisance of herself at our house too. There simply was no escaping or hiding from her; not even the safe haven of our house offered any protection or shelter from Aunty Stinkalot.

Apart from her appalling smell, Aunty Stinkalot also had the very irritating habit of rolling her eyes when she spoke. Not rolling as you think – rolling until only the whites of her eyes showed. For much of the conversation, the people she was talking to had the misfortune of having to stare at the whites of her eyes only.

What?

Why?

Being a friend to Ma Molly, Aunty Stinkalot knew all about how my father was toying with her feelings to get sex. Thus, whenever she saw my father pull up at our house with a huge bulge in his pants, she would ‘quickly’ run over to confront him and tell him to leave Ma Molly alone.

But my father simply lost his temper and ordered her off his property. She was told to never set her feet there again … much to my relief.

But God was much stronger than my father; he always made Aunty Stinkalot come back when my father’s back was turned….

There simply was no hiding when God had some beef with you. I learnt that very early on in life.

Aunty Stinkalot and Uncle Tiny Tony had three children – Elvis Crisphead, Snotty Sylvester and Round Julie.

Elvis Crisphead was the oldest. He got rid of all his teeth as a teenager, roots and all, and rumours had it that he had probably envisioned getting a toothache at some or other stage in his life, so he took the proactive approach… prevention is better than cure, after all.

Elvis Crisphead certainly was a man who planned ahead.

He never bothered to replace his teeth with false teeth and he walked around with a toothless mouth as if it was the most natural thing to do. Having no teeth in his mouth naturally changed his appearance quite a bit. Apart from having no teeth, he also had naturally crisp hair, which he wore in a thick bush in the same way that many black Americans did at that time. The combination of a thick bush of crisp hair and a toothless mouth was quite a sight to behold. It looked freakishly like an ostrich with a bush of very funny looking hair.

Downtown Despatch was accustomed to the many strange characters who walked around, like Silly Ed, who firmly believed that he was driving a car while he walked around the streets clutching his steering wheel. He even ‘parked’ his steering wheel in parking spaces … and beware the car that parked where his steering wheel was already ‘parked’.

There was major drama!

Even in a place like this, Elvis Crisphead stood out. He was quite a strange-looking individual. 

But, at the same time, he was also quite a nice and decent chap. The unsettling truth was that he was also the most ‘normal’ person in the family. His idol was Elvis Presley and he soon became an active Elvis impersonator, although he didn’t look or sound anything at all like Elvis, particularly not with that big bush of crisp hair and the flat, toothless ostrich mouth. Elvis Crisphead soon became Sunny Valley’s own Elvis, much to everyone’s embarrassment. However, he did miraculously make it onto a television programme and numerous radio programmes.

Incredible, but true.

Needless to say, the quality of programmes on radio and television was very dodgy at the time.

Snotty Sylvester was Elvis Crisphead’s younger brother. His trademark was a perpetual stream of snot running from his nose onto his lips, where he would wipe it clean with his tongue every few seconds, much like a car wiper would do. To the disgusted onlookers, it appeared as though Snotty Sylvester quite enjoyed his snotty treat every five seconds. Snotty Sylvester was almost a carbon copy of his father, Uncle Tiny Tony. Although he was slightly bigger than his father, they looked very much alike. They were also competing to be the dumbest in the family. I instinctively felt sorry for Snotty Sylvester from an early age. This shy, withdrawn, incredibly stupid person with absolutely no hope to achieve anything in life was an easy target for bullies. They loved to bully and mock him simply for who and what he was. 

So intellectually challenged was Snotty Sylvester that he stuck his foot under the wheels of an oncoming bus one day. The heavy load of the bus caused such damage to Snotty Sylvester’s foot and leg that he struggled around for some time after the incident with a heavily swollen foot and leg that looked blue and sick. When asked why he stuck his foot under the bus, he simply replied, “I just wanted to see what would happen.”

He certainly saw what happened….

Having no capacity to think for himself, he had to learn the hard way.

To the best of my knowledge, Snotty Sylvester was never taken to a doctor to tend to his leg. Whether it was his punishment or a lack of money or medical aid, I do not know, but Snotty Sylvester struggled with that medically unattended leg for a very long time afterwards.

When Snotty Sylvester comes to mind, I automatically compare him to Ed from the cartoon series Ed, Edd n Eddy. They are equally intellectually challenged.

As if this family was not a strange lot already, the worst was saved for last: her name was Round Julie.

Round Julie was shorter and fatter than her mother. Miraculously, she never had the same sweaty stench as her mother, because she was more conscious of personal hygiene. But she was a very strange individual nonetheless. Her favourite pastime was to pull her hairs out of her head one by one and then suck on it like it was some kind of favourite treat. This gave her endless hours of pleasure, and she indulged in this strange activity regardless of where she was or in whose company she found herself. When she was in Grade 8, she even got engaged to a man in his mid-twenties! At that time, she was semi-bald as she continued to snack on her hair….

The last time I saw her, she only had a few strands of hair left on her head.

Strange, very strange.

Their collective intelligence was lower than that of one very intelligent person. What their purpose on Earth could possibly have been was totally unclear. Their life was one of constant struggle and poverty, being ridiculed, treated like rubbish and absolutely no hope to improve their circumstances. Yet, they were given life… and at least they made Sunny Valley an interesting – albeit strange and embarrassing – place.

At least their presence in my life, makes my story very colourful.

To be continued….

***

Please hit the Follow button below if you would like to be notified when I post new content.

The horrible N-word

Negativity is a very destructive force that can control your life and hold you captive in it’s unforgiving claws. It comes in many shapes and sizes. I am always amazed to see how people indulge in negativity without even realizing what they are doing. What they also do not realize is that they draw in more negativity to themselves simply by participating in negativity … knowingly or unknowingly.

Every word you say will have an influence on your future. The same goes for every thought, feeling and action. By saying, thinking, feeling and doing negative things, you will draw in more negativity to you … guaranteed. Maybe not tomorrow, but it will come as sure as the sun will rise tomorrow.

You create your own tomorrow. How about creating it the best that you are able to? If you know you have the power within yourself to create a positive and happy future, then you will also know to avoid negativity. Negativity can never give you a positive and happy tomorrow. Success breeds success, just like positivity breeds positivity … and also negativity breeds negativity. Life is very simple and predictable (mostly).

The basic action to take, is to avoid saying anything negative … think anything negative … feel anything negative … or do anything negative. It is harder than you think, but with a lot of practice and conscious effort, you will master the art of only saying, thinking, feeling and doing positive things. It takes time, let me assure you, but once you have mastered it, you are good to go. It will become second nature to you. You will be so attuned to positive living that you will be horrified when anybody says anything negative in your presence.

You might think, “yes, but I got a reason to feel angry or hate someone.” Yes indeed, we all can find a reason to be angry or hate someone. By doing so, you are actually becoming the victim of that person. Anger and hate will consume you and drown you in an unhappy downward spiral. It will make you miserable and cannot bring you any satisfaction or success. You will only end up with a lot of resentment and unhappiness if anger and hate is your driving force.

I have all the reason to be angry and to hate the mother of my son for going all out to alienate us from each other. You know what? I don’t hate her. I am not angry. She will answer to the Universe when the time is right. Her evil and negative actions will not go unpunished. I don’t even waste a thought on her. I chose to simply make use of the situation to better myself in every possible way. To grow as a person. To become very successful in my career. To tie up all the loose ends. To live a healthy lifestyle and be the best version of myself every single day. She hoped I would crumble and go to waste due to her actions, instead I chose to do exactly the opposite. I have risen up and became stronger and better in every possible way. So, I have used a very negative situation and turned it into a very positive one. That’s the way to do it.

It takes extraordinary mind power, I know. But that is something we can all learn and develop. The point is that I am only feeling good feelings. I am only thinking good thoughts. I don’t wish the mother of my child any ill harm, no matter how evil her deeds were. I trust the processes and the laws of the Universe. It is not my place to feel anger and hatred. The Universal laws regulates us all. It is an unfeeling and unforgiving energy that gives back exactly what you give out … so best make sure that you only give out positivity and goodness. Only positive deeds, thoughts, feelings and words, no matter what the circumstances are. By doing so, I am getting better in every way, instead of going downhill fast. Those indulging in negativity, can only get the same negativity back. This is a simple universal law.

If I could learn to feel no anger or hate, so can you.

Feeling anger or hate, means that the other person controls you. They are in charge. Nothing good can come from that. Rather learn to accept what has happened and use the situation to better yourself in every way. You cannot control what has already happened yesterday or in the past. Make peace with it and deal with it in a positive manner. You can control – to a large degree – what will happen today, tomorrow or in the future. Make sure the outcome will be positive.

Never watch negative videos of people fighting or arguing. Don’t open it. Don’t watch it. Let them drown in their own negativity. Dont give their negativity more life by giving it your attention, time and energy. By embracing and indulging in negativity, you will simply draw in more of the same to you. Just don’t do it, period. I get very annoyed when I casually scroll through Facebook and am confronted with negative videos. For one, I cannot understand why people would post such sensationalistic and sadistic rubbish and, secondly, I cannot fathom why I am not given the option to avoid these videos by Facebook (or be protected against them). I never watch those. I scroll by very quickly and avoid them like the plague. The people who are guilty of posting such videos are indulging in negativity and will simply draw the same into their lives.

The same goes for offensive posts or posts complaining about bad service – or whatever – on social media. Simply don’t respond to them. Unfriend the person, if it is a regular occurrence. I know people who regularly gets involved in arguments and debates on social media about race, politics, religion or some other hot topic. Why would you do that? What you resist, persist. Simply scroll by and don’t make any comments. The only possible end result would be that you will feel angry, unhappy and your day or week gets spoiled. Rather use your energy on something positive and beautiful, than get involved in debates and arguments with idiots.

Just don’t do it.

Walk away from any negative situation. You don’t have to prove you are right. You don’t have to witness anything negative. Don’t stop at accident scenes, because you are a sensationalist person who thrives upon the drama and destruction of the situation. Don’t even look that way. Just drive by, wish them well and keep going. What good will it bring you to drink in exactly what happened, how and to whom. Feeding of such negativity can never have a positive outcome for you.

Look away and walk away … away from any negativity.

Do not associate yourself with people whom are always playing the victim … always complaining about their jobs, bad service or the behaviour of others. I will throw up in the presence of such a person. I will never go back to visit that person. Someone like that, sees only the negative and will only draw in more of the same. I do not want to be associated with that type of negative energy. Those are what we call energy vampires.

Above all, don’t use social media to voice negative feelings about a situation or another person. Apart from such behaviour being in very bad taste, it is also a very negative and destructive behaviour. It is annoying and irritating to everyone else and will draw in negativity towards you. Did I say it is also in very bad taste? Yes, indeed. You are better than that….

How you should deal with any negative situation, is to accept that it happened … and then to understand that it happened for a reason. Use the experience in a positive and constructive manner, not in a negative and destructive manner. Use such situations to come out a better version of yourself on the other side. Recognise the opportunity for growth and positive change and go for it.

Never worry or feel unhappy with what little you have or when you feel you are behind some people on your life’s journey. Understand that we all go at our own pace and have completely different circumstances and challenges. Recognise that some had a headstart and others were not so lucky. Rather be thankful for what little you do have, even if it is just to be grateful that you are alive. Focus on the positivity, always. There is always a positive in any situation.

Watch out which words you use. Never use words like “I can’t.” There is a cool saying going around, which reads something like, “whether you believe you can or believe you can’t, you are right.” Get the message? If you are negative and believe you can’t, you are right … you won’t achieve whatever your dream is. So, rather believe you can and go for it … because, indeed, you CAN. The only requirement is a positive mindset and the drive and discipline to go for whatever you want.

I am a strong believer that many mental sicknesses can be avoided, improved or cured simply by adopting a positve attitude to everything in life. Who will not get depressed when they always see the negative in everything? It really is so basic. If you learn to always see the postive and always feel happy, there really would be no trigger for depression. I know it is easier said, than done … but you will do yourself a lot of favours by simply choosing to always be positive and happy, no matter what the circumstances are.

I am not saying bad things won’t happen to you. What I am telling you, is to always see the positive in everything. Always find a reason why any negative situation had to happen to make things better in the long run. I am a strong believer in the saying, “when one door closes, a better door (or doors) will open,” provided you are positive about the situation. This has certainly always been the case in my life. When I lose one client or friend, I have learnt to feel rejoiced and happy, because I knew then that more and better clients or friends will come my way, if I remain positive. It always happened like that. The best part is that the clients or friends I lost always came back to me in the end too. By then, I have mostly outgrown them, but you get the point.

Relationships are one area in which you must learn to always know that the right ones will stay and the wrong ones will go. Don’t hang on to them, when they want to go. Let them go. Don’t feel rejected when someone rejects you. That is the best thing that could have happened. You will look back someday and say, “I am so happy it didn’t work out with that person,” or “what on earth did I ever see in that person?” Be glad when someone rejects you, because they are saving you from much drama and heartache by rejecting you now rather than later. Don’t long for someone that doesn’t want you. That is really silly, by the way. Love is a two-way street … never a one-way street.

Negativity is so much more than just your words and feelings. Try considering your actions. Actions are probably the most destructive negative force in your life. How? Everything you do can either be negative or positive. Just think about it. Eating crappy foods are negative. Not leading a healthy lifestyle is negative. Smoking and drinking is negative and destructive. Associating with the wrong people are negative. Messing with people’s emotions is a negative action. Having affairs with married people, are very negative. By indulging in negative behaviour, you are only drawing more of the same into your life. Pure and simple.

This is some deep, stuff, isn’t it? Yip, I amaze even myself sometimes.

Let me tell you how annoyingly positive, forgiving and devoid of negative feelings I am. Remember I told you about the mother of my son, whom alienated us from each other? I learnt to be so positive – and accepting of every situation – that I found myself greeting her in a friendly manner when I came face to face with her later on. Only after I greeted her, did I realise that I was actually friendly with a monster of a person. For a moment, I felt annoyed in myself and almost scolded myself … but then I realised how beautifully illustrative that moment was of how I had learnt to shrug of any feelings of hate or anger.

Dont just say it. Live it.

I am not saying that this stuff is easy to learn and embrace. If you are committed to embrace only positivity, you will develop the skill of positive living. Your life will become quite magical then. You will simply move on a different frequency than people who embrace negativity. Everywhere you go, you will seem to avoid negative people and situations. You simply won’t be at the same place, at the same time. You are not on the same frequency and you will repel each other … so you will never be in the same space at the same time. As the saying goes, “you attract what you are.”

The last thing you should do when you experience a few bad months, is to complain how bad it is and how down and out you are. The moment you utter those words, you will draw in more of the same. Don’t complain about how bad things are, even though they actually are. Always smile and be happy, despite the circumstances. Never say one bad word or feel one negative feeling. Know, that things will change around and become better, as if by magic. Your job is to simply feel positive and know better things are to come, despite how bad the current circumstances are. Use that time to improve your skills, knowledge or appearance. You will prosper better than ever before when the “drought” ends, if you simply hang in there with a positive mindset.

When you are at your lowest, you should be the most positive and the most dedicated to bettering yourself in every way. You should discover yourself on a level you didn’t know existed before. It is there. Discover that side of yourself. When things get better, you should then always embrace the lessons you’ve learnt when things were at their toughest. Always hang on to those feelings and attitude, no matter how good life is for you. By doing that, you will draw in more of the good life to you.

Don’t lie, cheat, abuse and steal. These are very destructive negative actions that will simply draw in more of the same to you. As I said before, negative actions are even more powerful than negative words, thoughts and feelings. Always do good and positive things with true integrity, no matter if nobody is watching. In fact, it is when nobody is watching that you will be sending out the strongest positive vibes to the Universe, by doing the right things in the right way. That’s true integrity right there. That is the highest form of good vibes or positivity you can ever send out to the Universe.

Arguments are for fools. Acting out is for emotionally immature people. Screaming, shouting, throwing things, sending nasty messages, slamming doors, etc are the actions of underdeveloped people. I cannot understand it. I cannot participate in it and I cannot tolerate the same. People who know me, know that you will get reduced to idiot status in my mind the moment you argue or act out in my presence. I will not retaliate, for one … and secondly, I will walk away and never come back. I won’t even be able to acknowledge or look at someone like that for a few days after the event. I have zero understanding for emotionally immature and undignified behaviour, period. Behaviour such as this is as negative and distasteful as they come. Apart from that, it says something about a person’s level of development. I simply cannot be associated with such behaviour, full stop.

Go figure why I am single….

Be a serene, dignified and clean being. See the beauty in everything. Believe everything happens for a reason. Be emotionally mature and dignified in behaviour. Be happy and positive even during the worst possible circumstances. Don’t complain about anything. Don’t say how bad things are. Don’t complain on social media about anything or anyone. If people wrong you, simply walk away and deal with the situation in private. Don’t be a vindictive person. Don’t hate. Don’t feel anger. Don’t be out to destroy someone, because you will only end up destroying yourself. The best and most powerful response to anybody who have wronged you, is to simply turn your back, walk away and cut them from your life.

That’s some powerful shit, right there.

***

Please hit the Follow button if you would like to be notified when I post new content.

***

Be the dream person.

Relationships are probably the most complicated aspect of life any human will ever have to deal with. It is a constant war out there. A war to find and conquer the love of your life … and then to keep that person. Deep down, that’s probably what we all want … that one person with whom we could live happily ever after. We fall in love … we fall out of love. Someone we really liked and loved at first, can become someone we truly dislike – and even hate – further along the line. Hearts get broken … we shed tears. Some even see it as a game to win as many hearts over as possible. Others toy with emotions simply to get into the pants of another.

I am guilty of all of the above.

I have loved geniunely.

I have toyed with emotions.

I have broken hearts.

I have actively pursued cheap sexual gratification (no, not the type you pay for).

Been there, done that. I have got all the t-shirts.

Inbetween all of the chaos, you will sometimes find two people who find each other and stay together for the rest of their lives. They get married and stay married. They remain life long partners. Dare I say that they are in the minority? I am not sure of this statement, but I think most marriages end up in divorce. I should rather say, that the majority of people have been divorced at least once.

I am 54-years old. I have been married and am divorced. I am the only one of my siblings who is not with the person I had married the first time around. All three my brothers and my sister, found their love, got married, had kids and built a life with that person. All of them are still with that very same first love to this day.

Where did I fall out from?

I am the odd one out in my family.

I am the only one who has been divorced (more than once). I am the only one who does not use alcohol. I am the only one who has never touched a cigarette in my life. I am the only one who has followed an academic career. I am the only one who has not strived for the white picket fence. I am the only one who has led an adventurous life books can be written about. I am truly different in every way. I am a very complex person, I must admit. I am the most relaxed and easy-going dude you will ever encounter, but at the same time, I am also extremely deep and have a repulsion towards unacceptable behaviour. I simply think nothing of walking away when I lose my respect or feelings for someone. I am brutal in that way.

I am a person of extremes. Either I do something full out, or not at all.

Although I truly wanted to settle down with one person and remain with her forever, I simply have not been able to do so. I have questioned why love has sidestepped me on many occasions. OK, let’s be honest … I have found love, but it was one sided. They loved me, I didn’t love them. When I did love them, it was only briefly so. I did truly love my first wife for most of our fourteen years together. I guess she can be called the love of my life to date. Yes, I did truly love her for a very long time. She was perfect for me at first, but things changed as the years sped by.

The problem is that I constantly grow. The person I was even two years ago, compared to who I am today, are vastly different people. So although I loved my first wife, I grew emotionally, intellectually and spiritually, while she remained the same person … even up to this present day. The end result was that I simply had to leave her behind, because we had nothing in common after fourteen years together.

From then on, I simply could not find anyone worth keeping. I was hungry for love. I have so much love I can give to the right person … and that’s the problem … I simply have never found that right person. Nobody has ever unlocked and experienced my true self. Some have never seen the side only my true love will see and experience. Different people bring out different things in us, after all. To be honest, I tripped myself up in spectacular fashion. I dated all the wrong women for all the wrong reasons. By doing that, I simply pushed the right person away, because I was too busy wasting my time and energy on the wrong women.

While I am writing this, I also realize that my ideal woman would never have liked me ten years ago … also not five years ago. The perfect woman for me has been out of my reach, because I was not yet on her level. I first had to grow as a person. For that reason, I first had to date all the wrong people. I had to learn some tough life lessons and I had to grow in every possible way.

I also had to develop and understand my INFJ personality. You see, I have the ability to see through people in a very short time. Nothing goes unnoticed with me. Each comment … each facial expression … everything tells me something. I can see deep into people’s souls. Senseless conversations, shallow people and pretentious behaviour are huge turnoffs. I am mostly bored stiff with most people after a few minutes. There are people I can sleep with and people I can date. When the sex is done, I cannot bring myself to put up with someone I cannot date. Then she has to go home. Every moment with them becomes torture then. There are many things I would rather be doing than offer up my time and energy with someone I cannot date.

Sorry, that’s the brutal truth.

Even during my wild days, I always longed for that one special person whom I could settle down with and be happy with forever. If I had any choice, I would pick someone and stay with her to the end of my days. I was a reluctant player. I played, because I could not find the right one to settle down with. Now that was the problem. By becoming impatient, I associated myself with the wrong women for all the wrong reasons. How would my dream woman ever be attracted to me while I was playing the field? It was never going to happen. I realised that … eventually.

So, six years ago, I realized that I must stop dating women just for the sake of dating. I also realized that I had to stop spending time with the wrong women, if I hoped to attract the right one. I realized one very simple thing: if I wanted to attract the love of my life, I had to be the dream man she was looking for. I had to live it. Be it. Day in and day out. I had to be the dream man, in every way, every single day.

Now that’s a tough task, for a shallow person … which I am thankfully not. I am a very deep person (although very few people have ever been allowed to experience that side of me).

That’s when my life changed course.

I stopped my sleeping around right then and there. I retired my trusty old six shooter.

I embraced the change with a passion. As I previously said, I am a man of extremes. When I commit to something, I go all out.

The first thing I did, was to visualise the type of woman I wanted. Then I visualised the type of man this woman would be attracted to. Then I had to become that man. See, I am not into fortune seekers … so I was not going to prosper simply to attract a certain (shallow) type of woman into my life. Fortune seekers won’t last a week in my world, no matter how beautiful they are. I am after a woman with substance. I was going to prosper to give my dream woman and myself a good life, not because that was what she was after. She has to be a woman who will love me no matter what my bank balance is.

Would she like that I hop from woman to woman? Nope … so I stopped doing that. I became exclusive and selfish with myself. I only sleep with someone I really fancy long term. I don’t even go for coffee with any woman I could not see myself dating, unless we are geniune friends. I had to purify myself … become completely celibate. Save myself only for the right woman. I became selfish with myself and who I spent my time with. I wanted a woman with the same qualities, so I also had to adopt a lifestyle reflecting these qualities. I do not want a town bicycle … and so, I had to stop being a town bicycle myself.

It was no use that I was looking for certain qualities in a woman, when I was not displaying those same qualities … even when nobody was watching. The fact is, I realised that my behaviour might not be seen by other humans, but the Universe does not miss a thing. Everything you do and say sends out a certain message … an energy. That energy will draw in more of the same energy. So, it is important to send out the right frequency or energy, because you attract what you are.

I was never going to be interested in any woman who loved bars, clubs, smoking and alcohol. These were easy to avoid as I have never been into any of those. I realised that I had to become part of groups or clubs involving things I enjoyed doing, like hiking, crossfit, mountain biking and people appreciating healthy lifestyles. By doing that, I would meet likeminded people … and hopefully, the love of my life. I could never date a couch patoto and people who lived to eat. We simply would not have anything in common, would we?

I was also never going to be interested in religous fanatics. The delusional mindset is not for me. I want someone who is just a beautiful, loving and kind person for no reason at all. No religious paybacks, nothing. Being spiritual is good … being overly religious is not appealing at all. So, a church is not a place I would look for a partner, but your needs might differ from mine. If religion is important to you, go to church and associate yourself with likeminded people. We all have our own interests. Follow yours.

Getting involved with married women, was also never going to happen. I have been approached by so many married women, simply wanting to use me for sex, but I always declined. I kid you not … I have received numerous indecent proposals from married women over the years. Most of them were inbetween forty and fifty years old. Seems that’s a very dangerous age for married women. Luckily, I was never even tempted to accept the open invitations directed toward me.

I cannot put out such negative energy into the Universe. It can only draw in bad things to me. Apart from that, I realise that any woman, who will cheat on her partner or husband, will cheat on me too. A person like that, is not worth it. A person like that, does not possess the integrity and qualities I want in a woman. I won’t be associated with that type of person. I will only ever get involved with someone who is divorced and free to date. I will NEVER become involved with a married woman. My advice to you is also to never cross that line. Nothing good can come from it. A cheater will remain a cheater. As he/she cheated on their partner with you, so he/she will cheat on you. Cheating is not a characteristic I want in my life, nor admire. I want none of it.

Being very particular what I find appealing in a woman, I realised that I had to become very distinguished and remarkable in many ways to ensure that I will attract that one special lady. So, I have been reinventing myself over the past six years. I am continually striving to be the dream man, for the right woman by doing the following:

HONESTY & INTEGRITY: I am open and honest. I do not lie. If I am wrong, I will own up to it and admit it and use that experience to better myself. Integrity is key. I want a woman who is open, honest and displays true integrity … so I also live my life by those same qualities. Only by being what I want in my dream woman, will I be able to attract her.

HEALTHY LIFESTYLE: I always look my best and I work hard on maintaining a youthful and healthy appearance. I eat to live, not live to eat. I am fit and healthy. I can never attract someone with the same mindset and lifestyle if I have not embraced the same principles to live my life by. I take pride in my appearance, because I know my dream woman would want to be proud of me (and vice versa).

SUCCESSFUL CAREER: I always strive to be better and sharper in my career. I constantly develop my skills and make sure I know all there is to know. When I do something, I either do it as best I am able to, or I don’t do it at all. That goes for everything in my life, to be honest. At age fifty-four I am now also a student, who is finalising his degree in architecture. I am tying all the loose ends in my life. I want a together woman, so it is only fair to be a together man.

BEHAVIOUR: My daily behaviour is always dignified, respectful and easy going. Even when I am angry, I will never scream and shout. I will always address any issue in a rational and dignified way … and I will never get involved in mud slinging or arguments. Emotional maturity is very important to me. I display the same and I want the same in my partner. The surest way to see me walking away, is to behave in an unacceptable and irrational manner. I simply do not tolerate stupidity. It is like flicking a switch in my head … one minute I respect you, the next you will lose all credibility and respect, simply based on your behaviour. This is probably the most challenging characteristic to find. To me this one is a real deal breaker. I can work around many things, but not around this one. I am hopeful to find someone dignified and rational, as I am. I simply cannot settle for anything less.

EASY GOING: I am the most relaxed person in the world. My mood is always pleasant and friendly. Is it too hard to ask for the same? We all have bad days, but surely we can laugh at our problems and display a positive attitude. I want people to feel comfortable, safe and happy around me … and I can only associate myself with a partner with the same qualities. I really don’t want to dislike her. I want to like her even when she is in a bad mood. That can only happen if she will be easy going, rational and emotionally mature.

You might have your own list of things you would like to see in a partner. Whatever that list involves, you got to be it … live it. Be specific. If you are not specific, you will get just anybody … and I promise you such a generalised approach will rarely have a good outcome. The bottom line is:

You attract who you are.

You attract what you are.

You attract what you identify with.

You have to remain the dream person (and get better at it) over the years, or you won’t be able to keep your dream person. If you change for the worse or let yourself go, don’t be surprised when your partner leaves you. Always become better and more powerful in every way. Never stagnate. Never become a shadow of the person he/she fell in love with. Grow in every possible way. Reinvent yourself on a constant basis.

If you happen to constantly attract the same type of wrong people into your life, it is time to look deep inside yourself and change your own core values. It is time to change who you are. It is time to become the person you wish to attract into your life.

That’s what I have done six years ago. In the past six years, I have only dated three women. The longest one lasted thirteen months. Now if you know me, you will understand that I have completely changed my behaviour from dating woman after woman, to being very selective who I date. Anybody who knew me more than six years ago, will tell you that I had quite a bad reputation with women. These people will tell you that they cannot see me changing my ways, like I did. Well they are in for a surpise, because the good and pure person in me has come to the fore … because that is what I want in a partner.

The three women I had dated over the past six years, were all women who would have been out of my league before, because I was too raw and unpolished. I have now become so polished and accomplished that I am attracting better and better into my life. I am truly attracting very high class women into my life, simply because of who I have become. I am very happy to be single (and prefer to be single) if I cannot date a woman with certain qualities. I would rather be single till the end of my days, than settle for anything less than someone reflecting my own qualities and standards.

Let go of the wrong relationships. Don’t stay … it is unfair to both of you. Reinvent yourself. Be the person you wish to attract. Live it. Be it. Display the characteristics you want in your ideal partner.

That person will come. That person will be attracted into your life, as if by magic.

I am still waiting for that special one, but I am cool with it. Even if I never find her, I will still have improved my life for the better in every possible way … and that’s a very good thing. I am turning myself into a powerful and accomplished person … and there are so much peace, gratification and contentment in that.

Even if I never find her, I know she is admiring me from afar.

Yes, I see you. I feel you. I know you also long for me.

I would rather be admired and respected from afar, than be involved with someone whom I have settled for. Rather than settle, I prefer to stay single and always keep reinventing myself … and being happy and content by myself and with the man I have become.

Let’s face it, you have to be very special to win me over … and keep me.

If we have the same heart, the same core values and move on the same frequency, we will find each other. Until that day, I will make love to only you in my dreams … I will shower you with a love only reserved for you in everything I do (even though we are not yet together). I will remain committted to only you every day. I can feel you. You are out there. I cannot share my love and my body and my dreams with anybody but you.

Those are only reserved for you.

I would rather live with you in my imagination, then settle for anyone that is not you.

You are special like that.

***

Please hit the Follow button if you would like to be notfied of any future blogs I publish.

***

Predict your future based on your daily habits and rituals.

What you do today, predicts your future. Your daily rituals, habits and behaviour will accurately predict where you will end up in the future. Guaranteed. This is an absolute science … or a law of the Universe. Simply by observing people and their daily habits, we can predict where that person is going to end up later in life. It is therefore critical to use this knowledge to your advantage by adopting the right daily rituals, habits and behaviours.

I remember a case in South Africa, where an older sister stabbed her younger sister to death. Both were teenagers and the case shocked us all to the core. After initially trying to lie her way out of it, the older sister was eventually exposed and jailed. You might think that she served her penalty in jail and that all was forgiven. The Universe does not work like that. Her actions predicted much worse for her. Her actions predicted that she would lead a tormented life and die at a young age. It happened exactly like that. She died in a motor vehicle accident a short while after she was released from prison.

Spare a thought for the poor mother.

In another shocking case, a man stopped his car by the side of the road and shot his wife and two toddlers to death in a time when politcal unrest in South Africa was at a high. He tried to shift the blame to black people, who supposedly attacked his family. His lies were exposed and he was jailed. Again, his behaviour predicted that he would lead a tormented life and that he would die at a young age. Again, it happened exactly like that. Shortly after his release from prison, he was electrocuted and died on the scene.

Who didn’t see that coming?

Let’s consider road rage. Are you guilty of frequent aggression and interaction with other drivers? If so, you better stop. Before you know it, you will end up in a self created accident … or be beaten up … or shot. Or you will end up beating someone up or killing them. Your life will change forever in that instant. Not in a positive way. Even if you are able to avoid the abovementioned, you will simply draw in negative energy into your life by participating in negative and destructive actions such as road rage. My own brother suffered the consequences of a road rage incident. His body will never be the same … neither will his quality of life ever be what it could and would have been if he simply chose to take the next turnoff and drive away from an explosive situation. Instead, he chose to pursue engagement with the other driver and the end result was that his neck was broken. In that instant, his life changed for the worst … forever.

I remember always warning him not to get involved in road rage. Despite my best efforts, my warnings were ignored … and what I predicted would happen, did happen. When it did happen, it was too late to wish he had listened and backed off from an explosive situation. His actions predicted his future, long before it actually happened.

It really is so simple to understand.

I am always amazed by the comments from overweight and unhealthy people, stating that they cannot understand why they cannot lose weight or that they are self conscious about their bodies, etc. The simple truth is that their own bad daily habits are the cause for them being overweight and unhealthy. As Tony Robbins mentioned in one of his workshops (not his exact words, but similar): “Just by looking at the people in front of me, I can accurately predict what rituals you follow every day. Those that are in shape, will have a daily ritual of eating healthy foods, drinking healthy drinks and being disciplined. They will also be physically active. Those that are overweight and unhealthy will have daily rituals involving unhealthy eating, indiscipline and physical inactivity.” It really is as simple as that. Your daily rituals clearly predict where you will end up. You can either be fifty and have a youthful appearance, be stronger and better then ever before … or you can be fifty and have the appearance of a sixty-five year old person. I see this every day of my life. So many sicknesses and disease can be avoided simply by adopting the correct daily rituals and habits.

Let me tell you: It is easy to predict who will end up with cancer, diabetes or some other disease. Your daily rituals and habits will predict your future very accurately. Simply by looking at your daily eating and drinking regime, it can be predicted where you will end up in life … sooner or later.

You have the power to write your own script … be it negative or positive.

Let’s consider relationships or marriage. I bet I can predict with an high degree of accuracy which relationships or marriages will last and which won’t. If I observe people long enough, I will be able to spot daily rituals and habits that wil either lead to a long, lasting and happy marriage or one that will end up in divorce or constant unhappiness and conflict. It really is not rocket science. If you hang out in bars, abuse alcohol, flirt with other people, are dishonest, deceitful and constantly fight with your partner (or scream and shout at your poor children), you can rest assured that your relationship is doomed for failure. Your behaviour and rituals predict the outome of any relationship.

You can never say, “I didn’t see that one coming.”

How about if you use, abuse and cheat your way through life? Think you will lead a happy and fulfilled retired life? Think again. If you are not dead by fifty, you will end up with all kinds of illnesses, disease and unhappiness … guaranteed. The majority of your life will be unpleasant, uncomfortable and unhappy, despite the fortune you may have accumulated.

Why do you think people end up homeless on the streets? Bad luck? There is no such thing. It all boils down to the choices they have made in life. Your daily rituals and habits will predict if you will become homeless or not. Each homeless person out there has a (true) story that will make it clear why they ended up being homeless. They wrote their own script. Their daily actions and rituals caused them to be homeless and poor. Nobody else is to blame … they steered their own lives towards the inevitable result.

The truth is undeniable.

If you don’t educate yourself, you will never prosper professionally. With that, I don’t mean you must achieve a degree (although that’s an excellent thing to do). I mean that you must educate yourself in your chosen field of interest. You can drop out of school in Grade eight, but become a multi-millionare because of the skills you have acquired in your chosen profession. The point is you will become a creator of jobs … never work for someone else. Your passion and willingness to improve your skillset will propel you upwards professionally. Doors will open for you. Those that simply work their nine to five boring job, which they hate, but never educate themselves and expand their skillsets, cannot go on to bigger and better things. Their daily actions and rituals predict where they will end up further in the future (still unhappy and still stuck in their boring nine to five jobs).

I am always astounded by criminals and their short sighted behaviour. By being the criminals they are, they are simply dooming themselves to a short and unpleasant life. Live by the sword, die by the sword. If you riot and loot and destroy things, you are only dooming yourself to a life of uphill struggle, poverty, fear and unhappiness. It is a vicious cycle of negative energy that will hold you captive for as long (or short) as you live. Again, your actions and behaviour predicts your future….

There are those today who wants everything for free. They are unable to provide for themselves and live to drink their weekends away. Some even want their tertiary education for free. What will the end result be? Their behaviour predicts their future. They will always have the victim mentality and will never prosper in life. They will always remain someone else’s problem. The system must always look after them. They will always live from hand to mouth and will never be in demand professionally.

The manner in which you treat your clients and the quality of service you deliver, will predict how successful you will be in your career. Always deliver passionate work and always having a good attitude and enjoyable personality … and you will always be in demand, even during difficult times. The colour of your skin is never a predictor of how successful you will be in life. Definitely not. Only your actions, daily rituals, passion and commitment to good service delivery, will either make you highly in demand or cause you to struggle. You write that script … nobody else … and not the colour of your skin.

If you have the nasty habit of living in the past … always uttering negative words … thinking negative thoughts … wishing bad things onto others … always playing the victim … you are predicting your own future. You will have a life of negativity, bad luck and unpleasant situations. Life will be difficult for you. Guaranteed.

By associating yourself with the wrong people … or the wrong behaviour … we can predict your future with accuracy. Your life will continue on that downward spiral associated with people and behaviour like that. Nothing good can come from making the wrong choices.

If you have dreams and goals you would like to achieve, your own action and daily rituals will predict if you are going to reach those goals and dreams. If you talk a lot, but do nothing, you will look back in a year from now and still be no further along the road to realise those dreams and goals. However, if you start by taking one step towards that goal every single day, you WILL achieve that goal. That sense of accomplishment will propel you to achieve even more and better dreams and goals.

Let me share with you my daily rituals and habits:

I work for myself from home. I have been doing so since January 1994. The one thing I quickly learnt was to always make sure that I put my eight hours of productive work in each and every day. If I do that, the financial rewards will be there. My daily action in this regard also made sure that my focussed energy draws in more work to me. So, by taking one step towards the right direction every day, I am making sure that the financial rewards will be there … and new work gets drawn in to me. Now, if I lay on the coach every day or sat in a bar instead of doing my work, that would not happen, will it? Simply make sure you take a step in the right direction every day by adopting the right rituals and behaviour.

I also know that what I put into my body, will determine how I will feel and look in the days to come … so I make sure to only put good and wholesome foods and drinks into my body every single day. By doing that, I am sure to stay in shape, remain full of energy and be healthy and vibrant. Consuming the wrong foods and drinks always makes me feel lethargic and out of energy. The right foods have the opposite effect. I always focus on how I want to look and feel … and then I take the right step daily that would support that image. So, I eat right … drink right and train right every single day. Just by taking that small step in the right direction every day, I am able to always be in shape, remain fit and healthy. On top of that, I am just getting better, fitter and stronger as I age. You will not believe what I do daily in crossfit classes at the age of fifty-four. The younger version of myself will be ashamed.

The next little step I take daily is to meditate or manifest. I will always make time to sit alone somewhere or to go for a walk. While doing that, I will repeat and reinforce the eighteen or nineteen orders (or wishes) I had put in to the Universe. So, every day I remind myself what I want to achieve … and then I make sure to actively take one step forward every day for each of those wishes. By doing that, I am ensuring that I will achieve every single one of those dreams or wishes. Again, daily rituals….

The next step I take each and every day, is to grow emotionally, spiritually and intellectually … so I make sure to read something or watch something educational every evening that would make sure that I take a step forward in that area. It really is no use to postpone these positive actions to the next day when you might feel like it. Just do it, daily. Make it a habit. Feed and exercise your brain, daily. That’s a step forward, every day.

The same goes for my studies. I make time to study each and every evening. Just one step forward each and every day. That’s all that is needed to achieve whatever acadamic qualifications you are after. Don’t postpone and leave it too late, because then the mountain before you might be too big to overcome. Rather take one small step forward each and every day and the degree will be yours.

Family and friends are also important in my life. For that reason, I will make time to chat with them and keep in daily touch. Even forwarding a little joke to people who are special to me, makes sure that they know they are important to me. That little action, is like taking a step forward in making sure I reinforce and maintain the relationship with those family and friends. Receiving one message from family or friends daily, tells me that I am important to them. They are making an effort to keep in contact with me. That’s a beautiful thing. Once you lose touch, it is difficult to rebuild that connection … so I make sure to take one step forward every day by keeping in touch with those people most special to me. That simple action predicts how healthy your social and family circles will be.

Just one step per day in the right direction (towards each and every dream) is all that is required. It is like climbing a mountain. Just take one step forward … you will and must reach the top at some stage. It is inevitable. So, simply see each of your daily rituals and habits as taking one step forward towards your desired goals. You MUST and WILL achieve them of you do so.

However, unhealthy daily rituals will predict stagnation, unhappiness and ill health.

In conclusion, my daily eating and drinking behaviours and rituals predicts that I will remain healthy and fit. It also predicts that I will maintain good relationships with my family and friends. My work etchic predicts that I will flourish financially. By reading and watching educational stuff, I make sure that I am growing intellectually, spiritually and emotionally. By writing at least one page of a new book or studying one page towards my studies, we can predict that I will finalise another book and achieve another degree. By not associating myself with the wrong people, we can predict that I would probably not end up in negative situations. So simple.

Just adopt the right daily rituals and habits in every facet of your life. Take one step forward in each area. By doing that, you can safely predict your future with a high degree of accuracy.

Just one little step forward every day … in every facet of your life, is all that is required.

Write your own script.

Predict your own future, by adopting the right daily rituals and habits.

***

Please hit the Follow button if you would like to receive instant notifications when I publish new content.

***

The alienation of my son, Sam (#006)

So, now I have been cleared by the SAPS and State Prosecutor that I may see my son. Good news indeed … but what astounded me, was that these clowns – who caused total havoc and destruction in our lives – now just left us to pick up the pieces all by ourselves. Incredibly, the same idiots who repeat the phrase “it’s all about the best interests of the child,” like true parrots, did not once think of seeing to it that father and son gets reunited with each other.

Isn’t that in the best interest of the child?

Surely.

Not in the world of these incompetent idiots.

The South African Police Child Protection Sevices came into our lives and tore father and son away from each other. They assisted Evil Anne in the alienation of father and son. They used the phrase, “it’s all about the best interests of the child” to justify their support for Evil Anne. Then – after many months of doing nothing (but assisting in the alienation of father and son) they simply said, “Yes, OK you can see your child” and then left us just like that … after all the trauma, pain and destruction they had caused in our lives. In a sensible and logical system, they should then have gone all out to make sure that father and son gets reunited with each other … and that Evil Anne gets prosecuted. They did none of that. They just walked away and left us to pick up the pieces.

How is this in the best interest of the child?

These people are equally guilty of criminal behaviour as Evil Anne is. As I said before, they must and will be exposed.

The first step I took when I was cleared to see my son, was to appoint an attorney to deal directly with Evil Anne. To me, she had seized to exist as a human being. I could not bring myself to even acknowledge her in any way, let alone communicate with her on any level. It is at this time that Evil Anne tried a fast one by borrowing money to try to (again) discredit me as Sam’s father. She approached the High Court in Cape Town and tried to ambush the system, then only notified us of the court date two days before. Despite their underhanded action, we were able to respond and file opposing papers by the court date. She didn’t see that one coming. She counted on us not having enough time to respond. We stopped her in her tracks. In the next few months, we got involved in litigation, which ended in a High Court order being issued in my favour. In short, the court granted me all my wishes and rejected all of Evil Anne’s wishes. A massive victory for me and my legal team. The bottom line was that the Family Advocate was appointed to look into and report back to the court re which parent Sam should permanently live with. That has been ongoing ever since … at my cost. It is a slow and methodical (and very costly) process.

Now let me share the shocking timeline with you. This should make it very clear how Evil Anne had coached and manipulated my little boy to further her own evil agenda. Stand back and see pure evil at work:

On 18 April 2016, my ex wife was in contact with both me and Evil Anne. My ex wife was playing the role of a self appointed detective on my behalf, to establish the whereabouts of Evil Anne. I suppose she was hoping I would be so grateful for this that I would take her back. That didn’t happen. It was only then that I learnt that Evil Anne had moved away to Cape Town with my son. On 20 April 2016, the pre-school in Cape Town suddenly reported that Sam was saying negative things about me as his father. Remember how she had also coached her other son to make the same comments about her ex husband a few years before that? Yes, the same evil cycle was repeating itself.

See the coincidence? Just two days after my ex had contacted Evil Anne, my son was now suddenly making negative comments about me. You really don’t have to be a brain surgeon to understand what is going on here.

But wait … there is more.

On 17 August 2016, Advocate Linda le Roux (State Prosecutor) cleared me to see my son. This was immediately followed by a spike in negative comments from my son to the pre-school. The pre-school also fell prey to Evil Anne’s evil agenda and suddenly concluded that Sam was doing drawings with sinister meanings. These were dated 24 and 25 August 2016. Then, on 6 September 2016, the pre-school also drew sinister conclusions from another drawing Sam did, although they were not trained psychologists or social workers.

Evil Anne was clearly coaching and manipulating Sam to act for the audience, each time she heard anything from my side.

So, twice now there were immediate spikes in negative behaviour from my son immediately after events (he had no knowledge of … or should not have had any knowledge of) happened. Just a coincidence, you say? Think again.

Maybe this will convince you otherwise….

On 19 September 2016, my attorney came into contact with Evil Anne to arrange immediate visitation with my son. On 20 September 2016, the pre-school suddenly reported that Sam was scared out of his mind, because “I was on my way to come hurt him.” Now, remember, Sam should not be aware of the fact that we had contacted his mother. It is blatantly obvious how Evil Anne was coaching him to act for the audience and manipulating the pre-school to support her in her evil agenda.

So, three events (of which my five year old son should have had no knowledge of) followed by immediate negative reaction from him. The negative reaction was not staggered or random. They came immediately after there was any mention of my name to his mother (not to him). She was the one who involved him. She was the one who scared him and told him that I wanted to come hurt him. Can you imagine what that little boy had to go through? Again, I must remind you that she did the very same thing to her other son and ex husband…..

See what Evil Anne was doing?

It is so blatantly obvious.

On 18 October 2016, Evil Anne informed the pre-school that I had applied to the High Court to take Sam away from her and take over primary care. Remember, this was all done in court papers, of which Sam should know nothing. On 22 October 2016, Evil Anne got the pre-school to sit down with Sam and he made negative comments about me. It was obvious from the comments that he was coached to believe that I wanted to come hurt him. OK, it is obvious that there is a pattern here, right? Even the most devoted Evil Anne supporter would agree that there is a definite pattern on display here. Coincidence has long been ruled out.

But wait … there is even more.

On my birthday, 7 December 2016, Sam and I had our first Skype session after not seeing each other for thirteen months. I was in Port Elizabeth and he in Cape Town. A social worker supervised Sam. Despite what Evil Anne had coached Sam to say to the pre-school, he reacted the opposite way when he saw me. He blew kisses at me and told me he loved me. We had a lovely session. However, Evil Anne made sure she was nearby to hear how he interacted with me. When she heard how positively he reacted to me, she went to work on him. She then coached him and threatened (just like she did to her other son and ex husband) him to behave negatively in the following Skype session a few days thereafter. His behaviour changed like day and night. The change in his behaviour didn’t make any sense. Yet, despite her coaching, he could not maintain the false facade for long … and always ended up interacting pleasantly with me. Again, it was blatantly obvious how she was manipulating and coaching him to act for the audience in support of her evil agenda. Abusing her child in this way, didn’t matter to her. It was all about what she wanted … not about the harm she was doing to Sam … and definitely not about the best interests of the child.

On 17 December 2016, Sam and I were physically reunited with each other. His behaviour was as loving and close to me as always. He told me that he was very happy to have me back in his life. The time we spent together went brilliantly well. He did not display one moment of fear or trauma, in the absence of Evil Anne. He was up close and personal to me at all times. During this session, we saw how Evil Anne’s other son was spying on us. We pretended not to see him. Then suddenly, when Evil Anne realised that Sam was not behaving as she had coached him to do, she went to work on him with more determination. Then Sam suddenly made negative comments to me during our next physical contact session. This happened only after we had played nicely for four hours, when I announced that I had to leave. He first played lovingly and beautifully with me for a few hours and then – when I had to leave – he suddenly remembered that he better make some negative comments, otherwise his mother would punish him later. The comments were made without any feeling … he certainly didn’t mean what he said. He just mouthed the words his mother had coached him to say.

It became very obvious then how Sam would run to me in wild excitement when I arrived for physical contact sessions, but how rejected he would feel when I had to go. Despite what his mother had coached him to do and say, he knew who his father was and he felt safe with me. His loving behaviour towards me simply rubbished everything Evil Anne tried to convince everyone. Sam wanted to get into my car on numerous occassions, wanting to go with me. His behaviour said it all. The heartbreaking thing to witness was how Evil Anne was ruthlessly exposing our innocent son to emotional and psychological abuse to further her own evil agenda.

On 27 January 2017, my attorney filed 254-page thick court papers to the High Court in Cape Town. A copy was also sent to Evil Anne. Let me tell you what this wonderful mother of the year did then. Can you guess? She shared certain things from my court papers with five-year old Sam simply to get him to make negative comments against me. Things he should have had no knowledge of, was shared with him. How shocking is this? What kind of a mother involves a five-year old boy in adult litigation? Yet, nobody stepped in to take her to task. Everyone was simply observing the situation and making notes for their respective reports … never once intervening to save Sam from the emotional and psychological abuse he was being subjected to by his mother.

From then on, we all witnessed the trend of negative coaching by Evil Anne each time there was an evaluation or appointment with a social worker or a pshycologist. I told all these people even before they saw Sam that he was going to be coached to act negatively for the audience (in stark contrast to how loving he was towards me before each of those critical meetings). It happened exactly as predicted every time. It was so blatantly obvious what Evil Anne was doing behind the scenes to her innocent little child. And still, everyone just made notes on what they observed and did nothing to intervene. This traumatised me very much. I could not stand by and see how my innocent little child was being abused by his own mother. I would rather walk away and save him from the abuse he was being subjected to … but that would have played nicely into Evil Anne’s plans, wouldn’t it? That would have meant that she got away with the perfect crime … so, I simply had to stay strong and fight for justice for Sam and I.

That is where we are at present. All the evaluations and investigations have been done. Evil Anne has been exposed. Everyone involved have realised what she had done. The evidence is there for all to see. The next step is to present all the documents to the High Court and have Evil Anne prosecuted and my son placed under my permanent care. The process takes time and it is costly … very costly … but we are now almost at the end of it. We will also most certainly sue the South African Police Child Protection Services for their role in the alienation of my son and I … and then not for accepting responsibility to reunite us with each other, as they should have.

So, this is my last post about this subject. I needed to document this story for various reasons. Firstly, in the hope that I can save other parents and their children from the same fate. Secondly, to make sure the right people learn about this story so that the system can be updated and become more “best interest of the child friendly” …. because at present it is anything but. My third objective was to make sure that there is a public record of exactly what happened, so that my son would be able to learn the horrific truth, should something happen to me.

The truth must be revealed to him, period. Remember, Evil Anne did exactly the same thing to her ex-husband … and her father and stepmother also alienated her from her real mother many years ago. This is a pattern in her life.

How sad is it that an innocent little child’s life was allowed to be so brutally destroyed due to the actions of his own mother? I am very scared of the damage that was done to Sam. I am worried about how he will turn out later in life … how all of this would affect him on the long run.

It is beyond comprehension.

I can just hope he is blessed with my good genes and that he will become a better person because of (and prosper in spite of) what happened to him.

Justice for Sam.

***

Please hit the Follow button below if you would like to receive instant notifications when I publish new content.

***

%d bloggers like this: