The magic of Gratitude.


Gratitude is a magical and powerful way of attracting good things into your life. If you show love, you will attract love. Notice the key word? “Show.” That’s the key word. It is not just meaningless words … it is meaningful action. Live what you say … don’t just vocalise it like a parrot. Express gratitude with your actions. Ever heard the saying, “action speaks louder than words?” This is critically important for the expression of gratitude. Show gratitude through your actions, rather than mouthing superficial and meaningless words. It is good to adopt a habit of saying thank you as many times as possible every day … but if you want to see real magic, your actions should express the same gratitude to the Universe.

At the end of 2015, I was subjected to a severely traumatic event when my little boy was ripped from my life. One day, we were happily together … the next, he was gone. No, he did not die … he is very much alive. You can follow that story in my blogs related to that horror story. The point is, that my life crashed into small pieces when my son was so brutally ripped away from me. For a period of four months, I could not work. I could not function in any way. I just breathed … although every breath felt like torture.

After four months of living in a zombie-like state, I realised that I had to take control of the situation. At that stage, the situation was controlling me. I was sinking into total destruction very quickly. Everything was falling apart around me, because I could not function normally. That’s when I decided to accept what has happened and to address it in a constructive and positive manner. I realised that I could only be victorious if I used the negative situation productively to better myself in every way.

That’s what I did.

It was then that I began to employ the magic of gratitude and positive living. Instead of distressing and being drawn into negativity, I adopted a positive and grateful attitude. I chose to view the horror events in a positive manner. Instead of asking why, I began to express gratitude for what had happened. I adopted the positive mindset that everything in life happens for a reason. The Universe had orchestrated the situation to force me to better myself in every way. This horror story was going to force me to move to the next level. I chose to believe that the events happened to ensure that everything would work out for the best for my son and I.

I no longer saw myself as a victim. I saw myself as a person being given the opportunity to better himself in every way.

I expressed gratitude, because I realised the situation was going to push me out of my comfort zone and force me to become powerful and accomplished. I felt motivated to become very successful, instead of allowing the situation to completely destroy me. I understood then how the negative situation was offering me an abundance of opportunities to better myself in every way. That was when I began to express gratitude by taking daily steps to better myself in every way … to achieve the things I had been dreaming of. My actions were expressing my gratitude to the Universe. I did also say thank you many times a day … but the gratitude I expressed through my actions was a million times more powerful than verbal gratitude.

The more I gave myself over to expressing gratitude, the more I understood that merely expressing gratitude, without feeling positive emotions … and without backing the gratitude up with my daily actions and rituals, was useless. I learnt that simply expressing gratitude in a superficial manner, was a meaningless waste of time. What I discovered was that expressing gratitude verbally was one thing. Actually showing gratitude was quite another thing. Verbally expressing gratitude is a very good thing, dont get me wrong. It is a bit superficial, though. The magic only happens when gratitude is shown and expressed with actions, habits and behaviour.

Allow me to explain.

If you express gratitude that you are alive and are thankful for the body you have been given, you are already on the right path. However, if the only thing you do is say thank you … but do not support the verbal gratitude with physical expression of gratitude, you are – sadly – not tapping into the magic of gratitude. I see this a lot. People say they are grateful to be alive, but then they drink or smoke. They do drugs. They are obese and unhealthy. With physical action like that, you are actually telling the Universe that you do not appreciate the life you have been given. You do not appreciate the body you live in. You are showing disrespect and are abusing your body. Your behaviour and actions are clearly sending the message to the Universe that you are not grateful for the life you have been given. You are thus sending mixed signals to the Universe. Your actions are cancelling the words of gratitude you have spoken. The most powerful signal is your behaviour or your physical expression of gratitude.

Your physical expression of gratitude then actually supports exactly the opposite of what your mouth is saying.

This is where you draw negativity into your life.

Your actions are negative and destructive, despite what you are saying. It is then exactly what you are telling the Universe you want more of. Please give me negativity. Let bad things happen to me, please. Let me live a sub-standard life, please. Please give me cancer. Please give me diabetes. You get what you put out into the Universe. You have ordered your circumstances … pure and simple.

See how gratitude really works?

Your habits, actions and behaviour have to line up with what you are grateful for.

The way to do it, is to be grateful for the life you have been given by expressing the gratitude in a physical manner. Lead a healthy lifestyle. Only consume healthy foods. Be fit and active. Build up your immune system. Now you will be sending the correct messages to the Universe. Now you will begin to see the magic of gratitude. You are being honest and real with the Universe by displaying gratitude through your actions. By doing so, you have now unlocked the power and magic of gratitude.

What is the use of being grateful you are alive and then go out and speed? Or text while you drive. Or drink and drive. All you are then telling the Universe, is that you want to die or be injured. You are also telling the Universe that you do not respect other life forms, i.e. innocent people and animals. You are indirectly putting yourself in a position where you can kill people or animals. You are sending out negative messages to the Universe. You are telling the Universe that you like danger, injuries and death. That’s what you will be given. You have asked for it by indulging in it … thus expressing gratitude for those negative things. Sooner or later it will be given to you. Your actions speaks louder than your words. Actions are the stronger expression of your gratitude.

Whatever you are indulging in, you are actually telling the Universe you want more of.

It is an expression of gratitude.

Simple.

I appreciate my partner, you say? Do you display gratitude towards your partner by being loyal and faithful towards him / her? If you flirt or your eyes wander, you are telling the Universe you want someone else … you appreciate someone else. Your relationship will perish or will be rocky, full stop. You might not understand why, but this will be one of the key reasons. You constantly get irritated by your partner? Fight with him/her a lot?

Stop!

The message to the Universe is, I am not grateful for this person. You will lose that person. You will drift apart. You will be unhappy. It might take years, but it will happen. Be careful what signals you are sending to the Universe. Your gratitude can be positive or negative. If you fight a lot with your partner, you are telling the Universe that you are grateful for animosity and drama … and poof, there are some more for you, says the Universe. That is after all what you appreciate in life, otherwise you would not indulge in it. If you really appreciate your partner, you will express your gratitude by always being loving, respectful and understanding of him/her.

If you know your partner irritates you and brings out the worst in you. If you are miserably unhappy in your relationship. Yet, you still chose to stay in that relationship … your actions are simply expressing gratitude for suffering, pain and unhappiness. You allow and indulge in sadness, fighting and arguments. That’s what you will get more of. You are grateful for it, by indulging in it – thus showing gratitude for it – so, you will get much more of the same.

Grow a pair and get out of the relationship, if you truly want something better.

Sleep in your car if you have to. Just do it.

Do you want to keep something or achieve something? Then show constant gratitude towards that cause. Do you want a better house? First appreciate and show gratitude towards your current residence … even if you currently only live in a room. Appreciate it. Be grateful for it. It might not be what you ideally want, but be grateful for what you have. Like magic, you will get a better house or better circumstances. If you complain about the one you have … if you feel unhappy about what you have … you will never get a better house or better circumstances.

Gratitude will magically transform your life, if you learn how to physically express it.

You want more work? More projects? First appreciate the work or projects you currently have. Appreciate each and every project by expressing gratitude in the form of doing that job or project passionately and thoroughly. As if by magic, you will draw in more and better projects or work.

Even during the worst times in your life, you will have to learn to express gratitude for whatever is given to you. However little it is, express sincere gratitude with your actions, emotions and attitude. If you do that, you will get more and better of the things you are grateful for.

It really is like magic.

If you are grateful for each cent you have, the Universe will give you more money. The point is, the Universe will give you more of whatever you are grateful for. This applies to every facet of your life, be it money, love, happiness, health, friends … or whatever.

If you make a habit of complaining about things, the message to the Universe is that you appreciate conflict, discontent and unhappiness. You are actually expressing gratitude for conflict and unhappiness by indulging in it. Guess what? Your wish is my command. Conflict and unhappiness will come your way, guaranteed. It will follow you around, because that’s what you expressed gratitude for through your behaviour.

Most people believe that expressing gratitude is primarily a verbal thing. Far from it. Expressing gratitude, involves three actions:

  1. Verbally expressing gratitude … but not like a parrot.
  2. Truly feeling grateful … deep, real and raw … no superficial pretence.
  3. Expressing gratitude by your daily actions, habits and behaviour. This is where the power of gratitude is … the physical expression. This is where the magic happens. This is where the shit gets real. Sorry, I find it amuzing to let out the gangsta in me at times.

Do you want to drive a luxury car? First show sincere gratitude for the car you currently have. Cherish it and truly feel grateful that you have a car. Wash it … polish it … don’t litter in it. Drive it with respect. Say thank you to your car, each time it takes you from Point A to Point B. It could have died on you … it didn’t … express gratitude for that. Tap the car on the hood, say thank you and feel real gratitude for it. At some stage, you will get that luxury car. It might only be a second hand luxury car … but you will get it.

I often see cheaters on the sporting field, trying to con the referee into awarding his / her team a penalty or something. I always shake my head in disbelief when I see that. By expressing gratitude for cheating (and indulging in it) this person is telling the Universe that he / she appreciates cheating. This person does not appreciate fair play, integrity and honesty. As if by magic, this person will con and be conned … he will cheat and be cheated upon … not only on the playing field. He appreciates cheating, dishonesty and unfair play … so it will be given to him in real life too. In some form or another, he will either cheat or con himself … or he will be cheated on and conned by others. That’s what he asked for by displaying appreciation for and indulging in cheating and conning. His actions clearly stated that he is grateful for cheating and dishonesty. That’s what he will get more of. His on-field cheating will overflow into his real life, because the Universe does not understand that he was only playing a game. The Universe understands:

“I like cheating. It is a good thing. I am grateful for cheating. I want more of it, please.”

Your actions are simply a reflection of what you appreciate … in other words what you are grateful for … be it positive or negative.

People who like to watch real life violent videos or negative incidents are telling the Universe that they want more violence, drama and negativity in their lives. Your wish is my command. By expressing gratitude and appreciation for violence, negativity and drama you are simply drawing the same into your life. Not only on your cellphone or TV screen, but also into your daily life. Violence, negativity and drama will seek you out, rest assured.

Be careful what you indulge in … or where you direct your energy to. You are expressing gratitude with your attention and energy. Your wish is my command….

Learn to show gratitude for even the smallest insect, animal or plant. Each serves a purpose. Appreciate and respect them. Say thank you for them. Show gratitude by admiring them and respecting their existence. Appreciate the wonder of life flowing through them. Show gratitude for the smallest things in life, like being able to see, hear or speak … or even to breath. Show how fortunate you are by appreciating it in word and deed. Never take it for granted. You can only get more and better by expressing gratitude in a positive manner.

Even if you are homeless today, express gratitude for being able to look at a beautiful tree or flower. Touch the bark of a tree and appreciate its wonderous existence. Appreciate the magic of life in the insect on the ground next to you. Appreciate the scrap of food you may have received. Look up to the sky and appreciate the wonder of the Universe we live in. Acknowledge that you are not the victim of anything or anyone. Your own actions and choices created your current circumstances. You can magically change your fortunes completely around, if you really want to. Simply begin by expressing true gratitude for even the smallest thing you are able to enjoy or experience … just make sure it is something positive.

Even if you love being homeless, express gratitude for it by enjoying every moment and embracing the lifestyle. That way you will make sure you remain homeless.

By littering or finding pleasure in killing animals or insects, you are telling the Universe that you don’t appreciate this planet you are living on. You don’t appreciate other life forms. You appreciate destruction and killing. You will be given messy circumstances to live in … or your life will be messy, just like the litter you tainted the environment with. You appreciate littering, killing and are disrespectful towards other life forms? Guess what? Negativity will follow you around. You don’t appreciate this planet … this planet won’t appreciate you. You will be worked out. You will not get all the goodness and grace the Universe are able to give you.

Do you like superficial and temporary relations with men or women? Toy with people’s emotions? Guess what? You will get lots of those … but none of the permanent good stuff. I am especially guilty of this one. Up to six years ago, this was how I lived my life. I realised that I had to stop and change the signals I am sending out to the Universe, if I ever hoped to find the love of my life. Show appreciation for honesty, loyalty and integrity. Express love … save your sexuality for the right one. Don’t share your body or time with the wrong people. Show gratitude for a deep and meaningful lifestyle and existence. That’s what you will attract by displaying gratitude and appreciation for these good qualities.

Sleep around a lot and use and abuse people? Your wish is my command. You will give and receive a lot of sleeping around and superficial things. You will never receive true love and commitment, because that is not what you are grateful for … your own behaviour dictates that. Your own actions display what you appreciate and are grateful for. You will get more of those.

I had to learn this the hard way.

I had to change everything about myself to be who I am today … a man worthy of the woman of his dreams.

I am grateful for what happened with my son, because it pushed me to the next level … and beyond. I have grown beyond recognition since the horror events … and I am grateful for that. I have bettered my life in every possible manner … and it would not have happened if my son was not alienated from me. Thank you for that. The events surrounding my son had to happen to ensure that he will be placed under my permanent care … thank you for that.

I express gratitude for my body and life by leading a fit, healthy and balanced lifestyle.

I express gratitude for being alive by not speeding or taking risks … or not getting involved with married women. You catch my drift?

I express gratitude for my mother by spending as much time as possible with her and always being there for her when she needs me. I tell her I love her every time I see her or speak to her on the phone.

I express gratitude for a good income and projects by working passionately on the projects I am given.

I express gratitude for every rand that comes my way. It could have been given to someone else.

I express gratitude for the love of my life (whom is still making her way to me), by not associating myself or wasting my time with other, less deserving women.

I express gratitude for this planet I live on, by living in harmony, awe and wonder of it.

I express gratitude for my talents by polishing them and making use of them.

I express gratitude for my mental health by constantly growing intellectually, emotionally and spiritually.

I express gratitude for every failed relationship that moulded me into the man I am today. I choose to learn from them. I appreciate the lessons they taught me. By learning from them and by not repeating the same mistakes and patterns, I am improving my own choices and habits. This is actually an expression of gratitude for becoming a better and more polished version of myself. By being selfish with who I share my time, energy and body with, I am guiding the Universe to the type of woman I appreciate and want in my life. It is a physical expression of gratitude to only spend time with someone I truly value as a possible life partner. I am not referring to innocent coffee dates with female friends. I am effectively eliminating the wrong types, by not spending time with them. My actions, behaviour and growth are showing the Universe what type of woman I am grateful for … hence being able to attract the love of my life into my life.

Move your ass, won’t you?

I express gratitude for integrity by always doing the right thing … even when nobody can see me … or when nobody will ever know.

I express gratitude for my last bowl of rice, because I could have had none.

I express gratitude for each morning I can wake up and experience the wonder of a new day … a new opportunity … a new page … a new chance to start all over … the next step on my beautiful journey.

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Published by Gerhard J. Loots

I am currently completing my Bachelor of Architectural Studies through Nelson Mandela University. I am the published author of Stuttering Joe - Part 1 (Growing up in Sunny Valley). I have also recently launched my blog, called Stuttering Joe, which is based on my true life experiences, personal growth and adventures.

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